Life as we know it
by LcarbyM
Summary: A Carter and Abby high school fic. Best friends fall in love, but when a secret ruins their relationship can they ever find their happy ending? COMPLETED.
1. Abby

Okay, so Im still working on my other story, but I really wanted to start a high school fic... so let me know what you think.

Little Background:

Abby 18, Carter 17, Susan 18, and Luka 18, are all growing up in chicago.

Luka moved there when he was 13 from Croatia.

Carter and Abby are best friends, along with susan and grew up together.

Carter and Susan are the only ones at school that know about maggie.

Abby really likes Carter, but his eyes are for Susan, who is the basic blonde beauty at school. Abby was more of the ton-boy.

Abby moved away last year when maggie got a job back in minnesota, and she has just moved back for senior year.

I dont know if I can do this. Its been a year since I have set foot in this school, a year since I have seen all of my friends, and a year since I have stood eye to eye with John Carter. So much has changed this past year. My mom has been on her meds, eric enrolled in a military boarding school, and as for me, well I definitely wont be recognized. I have long hair now, and I ditched my brothers clothes for some of my own.

After Maggie's company transferred her back to chicago, I decided to come home and finish school where I started. I haven't really talked to anyone but susan and carter, and we really lost touch over the year. I wonder if they have changed at all? I wonder if Carter finally got a chance with Susan? He has wanted to date her since we were 5 its seems, and she never seemed to notice him. She has always been pretty popular, going for the jocks and older, well, jerks. Carter was different. He was rich and cute and all the girls loved him, especially me. I can say I always had quite a crush on him. Before I left last year, it seemed like Carter was going to take the dive and ask me out, but when it didnt happen, I started dating Luka. That put a pretty good strain on the relationship with Carter. I could never understand his feelings towards me.

I walk into school and into the classroom, right off the bat I see susan. She doesnt seem to recognize me, not that I blame her. She is used to Abby, the t-shirt and jeans girl with the baseball cap. I walk in today wearing a green silk short-sleeved shirt and tight jeans, my hair down and wavy. When she finally spots me, I think her jaw detaches from her mouth.

"ABBY? Oh my god, you look amazing!"

"ha, thanks susan. Its great to see you." I go over and she runs and hugs me. Its really is good to be back here.

"how have you been, I haven't talked to you in forever. I didnt even know you were coming back... did you tell Carter? Cause' i'll kill him if he knew and never told me."

"No, I didnt tell anyone. I dont even talk to Carter anymore really."

"Well, forget him. Im so glad my best friend has come back. This year is going to rock!"

The rest of the day goes great, I really missed Susan, and Luka too. I havent seen John yet, and it is about time for last period. I am about to walk in when susan pulls me back out the door.

"Whats up?"

"I just ran into Carter, we should go say hi. His jaw is going to drop when he sees you, along with every other guy today."

"I dont know if I should, maybe lat-"

"Nope. C'mon Abby you cant avoid this...HEY JOHN"

"Susan, please." No point in arguing, she is pulling me towards him as I speak. He turns around to face us and I cant believe the butterflies that I STILL get. Why cant I just get over him. Susan was right though, his mouth is wide open and I can feel myself blushing like crazy.

"Abby?" Wow, he didnt even need to look twice, guess I still look the same to him.

"Hey Carter."

"Wow, you look so different." He pulls me into a hug and I can feel my face burning.

"Yea well, its been awhile."

"Yea, it has. Well im glad your back we've missed you." he says as he gestures to susan. I cant help but feel really awkward as Carter stands there staring at me. Then all the sudden I feel myself wanting to puke. As we are standing there a younger girl, maybe sophomore or junior comes up to carter and grabs hold of his hand. She leans over and kisses him, looking at me the whole time. Well I guess she made her point.

Susan pulls me aside and whispers in my ear that its Carters girlfriend of two months, Wendall. I guess she moved here three months after I left. So I guess Carter and Susan didnt happen, but Im not so sure im happy about that anymore.

so what do you think...im writing two stories at once so I will update as much as possible, if everyone likes it.


	2. baseball hats for bikinis

Carters POV

Sitting in the jeep, driving home I cant help but think about seeing Abby again. Growing up we were inseparable, then she moved and we became like strangers. I cant get over how much she changed over the past year. She completely lost her ton-boy looks and she just isnt the same ol' Abby. All the guys were totally drooling over her all day, but I just still don't see her like that. I mean its Abby. Abby, my throwing partner, the girl that would never wear a bikini, the girl my parents let me share a bed with since I was 5 because they knew nothing would ever happen.

I have to say things have changed around here also. Im dating Wendall now, a super cool chick who is a junior at our school. We get along really well and like the same stuff, but sometimes she can get kind of clingy. Susan and Mark starting dating, Mark is a college guy at Northwestern that she met over the summer. Luka was still in love with Abby after she left, and he hasnt really dated much. We all thought he was over her until yesterday when he about lost his head when he saw her. I still cant believe those two ever went out in the first place. He is so wrong for her, she was never happy with him.

The next day at school I am talking to one of the guys about my b-day bash im throwing saturday, when I see Abby walking to her locker. I walk over, deciding that I should invite her, I mean she is still Abby.

"Hey."

"Hey John." Aw, yep still Abby. She is the only one who calls me John other then my family.

"Listen i'm throwing a party this Saturday at my house... you think you might wanna come?''

"Oh right, your birthday. Sure I guess so." she remembered my birthday? hm.

"Great, well its a pool party so bring your suit and it starts around 4."

"Well, I'll see you th-"

"Hey Abby!" Well, if it isn't Josh Nolan, why the hell is he talking to Abby?

"Um, hey Josh. Whats up?"

"Well, I was wondering what you were up to this weekend, didnt know if you wanted to hang out?"

"Actually I'm going to Carters party." Ha. I look at him and smile with a nod. He looks at me for a sec and then turns back to Abby. This guy is the most popular all american ass around. He usually is hanging all over susan, but I have never seen him talk to Abby.

"Well, me too...I guess I will see you there?"

"Sure. I gotta go...I'll see you Saturday Carter." and she walks into Calculus. Always was the smart one. Im left standing there with Josh and I feel the urge to punch him and he stares at Abby walking away. This guy is not Abby's type.

"So Carter, your friends with Abby, I mean you knew her when she used to live here... you think I have a shot?"

"Sorry man, I don't think so-"

"Aw come on, why not? I mean the chick is smoking ever since she got back... everyone thinks so."

"Abby just isnt your type."

"Well, we shall find out saturday then wont we."

"We shall."

reviews?


	3. Part of the crowd

Abby's POV

Saturday finally came and I am standing in front of the mirror trying to figure out what to wear. I have to admit that I am not that excited about going to Carters, i mean with Josh being there and also how weird things are with Carter. I just dont know. I decide to wear my new bikini, olive green with a black hibucus flower going up the side. It really shows off the tan I worked so hard on this summer.

I pull up to the carter mansion with susan, and you can see the millions of cars already there, including Josh's. He's cool and all, but I always thought he was just a pighead. As I walk into the house I look over at susan and I cant help but smile. Susan was one of my best friends when I lived here before, but I never felt as pretty as she was. Now walking with her, I smile because we look identical. We both have our hair down and wavy, hers a little shorter, and we are wearing jean skirts and tank tops.

After a few hours of horsing around in the pool, I finally feel back at home. Carter and I have been hanging out all night and it is just like old times. I met Susan's boyfriend and he seems really cool, the only problem was Wendall. She just doesnt seem to like me very much, Susan says she thinks I like Carter. Well, I did, but now I dont mind just being friends with him.

"Hey Abby." Ah, josh. I was wondering when he was going to show.

"Hey Josh."

"You look great tonight."

"Thanks, are you having fun?" I cant help but blush at his compliment. He seems like hes changed.

"Yea, Carter always throws good parties, ya know?"

"Yea I know, hes crazy."

"So, I was gonna head in the hot tub.. you wanna come?" I look at him for a second, and I have to say he seems really nice. Not the jerk I used to know. What the hell.

"Yea, lets go."

I spend about an hour in the hot tub with Josh just talking to him and his friends, and even though I'm starting to feel sick I dont want to leave. I know it sounds cheesy but I like hanging out with Josh, I feel like the center of attention, and I have never had that before. We finally get out and I head over to Carter to let him know we are leaving. I had been hanging out with him for awhile then I left the pool and went with Josh.

"Abby, hey I haven't seen you all night."

"Sorry, I've been over in the hot tub with all them."

"Oh, well thats cool."

"Yea, actually I just wanted to let you know that we are heading out."

"We?"

"Josh and I are going to head over to his house with some guys I guess, I mean unless you want me to stay... cause I just thought the party was almost over and-"

"No, no its fine. Just...I don't know be careful of him Ab. you know how sleazy he can be."

"I used to think so too, you know, but he seems like he's changed. He has been really nice to me, and he seems pretty cool."

"Yea, well have fun."

"Thanks Carter, Happy Birthday." I say and give him a hug. I pull away and he stares at me.

"What?"

"Nothing, I..Im glad your back. I missed you."

"Me too. I'll call you, we can hang out... if its alright with Wendall."

"Yea, definitely, dont worry about her. She is just a little jealous of how close we used to be."

"Hey, not used to be...are. You are still my best friend John."

"You to Ab." He smiles at me and I suddenly feel the urge to bail.

"Alright see ya later."

"See ya."

As I leave with Josh I cant help feel badly for leaving Carters party. At the same time I am excited to hang out with him. We headed over to his place with all his football buddies and some of their girlfriends, even susan came with mark. It was actually a lot of fun. We all hung out and I even drank a little, something I had never done before. I felt like part of the crowd and I loved it.

I ended up crashing at Susan's that night, not wanting to go home drunk. She was with me at Josh's and she knew I couldn't go home. It felt so good to finally hit the pillow that I passed out immediately, and even though I spent all night having fun with Josh, as I fell asleep all I thought of was Carter.

Next Chapter: Abby makes a bad decision and Carter has to help her, Wendall and abby talk, and Carter lashes out at Josh.

So what did you think?


	4. Remember when

This is pretty long, I wanted to fit as much into one chapter as possible. I changed POV's a lot so I hope its not to confusing.

Carter's POV

'i'll call you' ha yea right, its been about a week since my party and I have yet to talk to Abby. Every time I see her in school she is with Josh, I guess they are seeing each other now and since we dont have any classes together I never have a chance to talk to her.

Tomorrow night Josh is throwing a huge party out at his parents lake house, tons of drinking, lots of meat heads, and plenty of girls. It is weird to think that Abby is going to be one of them, she never used to like, let alone talk to any of that crowd. I don't really feel like going, even though I was invited, but at the same time I feel like I should go just to watch out for Abby.

"Yo, Carter!" ick.

"Hey, Josh."

"You coming tomorrow night?"

"Um, yea maybe."

"Aw come on, its gonna be a blast. Lots of hot chicks.."

"I have a girlfriend... and so do you right?" yea, real subtle idiot.

"Nah, well you mean Abby. Yea I guess but I can still have fun right." he says hitting me in the arm and winking.

"Dude, thats not cool. Abby is my best friend if you dont like her leave her alone."

"Of course I like her, she's damn hot, but I mean come on why have just one if you can have more?" he jokes

"What! Look leave Abby alone. She deserves better then that crap."

"Carter please, Abby is a big girl."

"Leave her alone Josh, I mean it." I say getting in his face.

"Or what?" he yells shoving me backwards.

"HEY! Josh, what the hell are you doing. Leave him alone." Abby yells at him as she steps in between us.

"See you tomorrow night then." I say and walk away looking at Abby. She seems dumbfounded. I have never been the one to fight, but I'll punch that guy and change I get.

Abby's POV

I am sitting at Andrew's lake house extremely bored and surrounded by the stupidest people I have ever met. Everyone is drunk by now and its only 9pm. I see Carter show up with Wendall and Susan but he doesnt seem to want to talk to me. What a great night this has turned out to be. I walk over to the table and decide to grab a couple of drinks, what the hell. Josh is to busy to pay any attention to me and Susan is too busy making out with Mark.

After a quite a few drinks I am totally drunk, and I just keep going. Considering I have only drank twice in my entire life, both with Josh, both in the past week, I dont really know when enough is enough.

"Abby, right?" great.

"Yep. Wendall?"

"Yea, listen I wanted to ask you, are you with Josh?"

"Why?"

"Well, I was just wondering...I mean I know you were interested in Carter-"

"Carter, uh, Carter is my best friend but he doesnt see me like that."

"But you do like him then?" she is definitely getting pissed, and I am beginning to slur my words.

"What does it matter? Yea I like him, ok."

"Well I would appreciate it if you stayed away from him. I mean we are together."

"I'll talk to John whenever I want." I say and walk away, well I bet she just loves me now. I need to learn not to be so bold when I'm trashed.

Carter's POV

It is hitting about 12:30 and everyone is smashed. I see Abby in the corner of the room hanging all over Josh and I want to barf. When did she become so different, she is acting like every other blonde ditch in our school. She is definitely drunk, no doubt about it, and no doubt that Josh is loving it. He keeps making out with her and grabbing her, I want to punch him.

I decide to walk over and pull Abby away before she does something stupid. As I approach, Josh pulls Abby closer and I can tell this isnt going to go well.

"Hey Abby can I talk to you for a sec."

"uh, im kind of busy John."

"Yea, I see that, well it will only take a sec."

"Hey, buzz off Carter you heard her." I pull Abby's hand but Josh pulls her right back. I get up in his face and push him yelling something about not listening to what I said yesterday.

It looks like we are just about to beat the crap out of each other when I hear someone scream Abby's name. I look over and Abby is passed out on the floor. I run over to her and try to wake her but she isnt breathing, alcohol poisoning probably, great. I give her mouth to mouth as everyone frantically looks on. Having a bunch of drunks and no sobers at one party isnt the best idea. She finally comes too, puking everywhere. Someone had already dialed 911, but they called back and told them it was a mistake because Josh didnt want the cops there.

"Abby, are you ok?" She looks up at me and grabs my shirt, as if I am about to drop her in a pool of sharks.

"Carter, I dont feel so good."

"Yea, who would have thought." She begins puking again and I bring her into the bathroom, Josh following.

"Is she ok man?"

"Yea, she should be ok, I'm taking her home though."

"Dude, you said she is fin-"

"We're leaving Josh." he isnt going to protest. He knows i'll call the ambulance again if I cant bring her home.

I bring Abby back to my house and help her out of her clothes and into some of mine to sleep in. I cant believe she would drink that much. What was she thinking? and Josh, what an idiot.

After about 10 minutes Abby is still in the bathroom, so I knock to make sure she is ok. She doesnt answer so I open that door, worried. I see her sitting on the bathroom floor, leaning against the bathtub.

"Hey."

"Hey, are you ok?"

"I dont know, I'm really sorry about this Carter."

"It's ok Abby." She is still out of it, but i think puking all of that up helped her sober a little bit.

"Do you remember when we were like 7 or 8, and I got hit in the face with that baseball bobby threw at me?" she asks.

"ha, yea I remember that. He never had great aim."

"I was so upset, and it hurt like hell... but you came over and you kissed my eye and told me it was ok if I got a black eye cause I would still be beautiful." Wow I cant believe she remembers that, and why now? I cant believe I remember that for that matter, but I do, and she would have been.

"Yep, and you did get a black eye, and you were still beautiful. Just like you are now. Look, I know you think Josh is a good guy, but he really isnt Ab. Trust me. You deserve so much better-"

"All I ever wanted was for you to think I was pretty. So when you said that, that day, It didnt even bother me that I got a black eye, and when I went to school and everyone picked on me for it. I didnt care." So she is still drunk. Not listening to anything I am saying about Josh I guess. I kind of always knew Abby liked me. Susan told me once to get off my high horse and ask her out, but I never had the guts. It just seemed to weird, but now I wish I had. I dont think she has ever looked as pretty as she does now, sitting in my oversized T-shirt and a pair of her shorts she left here from the party last week. Her hair is wet and wavy.

I silently slap myself, why the hell am I thinking of Abby, I have a girlfriend. Wendall is great but being around Abby is amazing, after all that time apart we still connect completely. She really is my best friend.

"Bobby hit you pretty hard that day." I laugh to myself.

"Yea, Carter... I'm sorry."

"For what?"

"I didnt mean to bring up Bobby." Ah, right. Abby knows that Bobby is a subject we dont discuss, even if she is drunk she still knows how sore that is for me. Ever since he died I like to avoid talking about him.

"It's ok. It's nice to remember him every once and awhile, the three of us had a lot of good times growing up."

"Yea, we used to have so much fun."

"I remember the day he died." I say getting serious. I dont like talking about that day, but for some reason tonight I'm just happy to be thinking of him. "I ran to your house from the hospital and you were already running out the door."

"Ya, gamma had called me."

"Ya, I was so scared and upset and angry I didnt know what to do. But you ran out and gave me a huge hug and told me that it was ok because he was happy and free now. I remember going into your house and we fell asleep on your bed crying."

"I remember. That was such a horrible day, your parents were being awful, and my mom wasn't on her meds. I just remember us crying for hours, sitting in my room. You were so upset, but you held my hand the whole night making sure I was ok."

"Well I held your hand, but you were holding mine. That seems so long ago now."

"I know, we were only... what 12?" I nod, and she grabs my hand. I smile and pull her off the floor as we make our way to my bedroom.

We climb into bed and lay facing each other, still holding hands.

"Carter?"

"Yea?"

"Thanks for helping me tonight... I know I am going to be hurting tomorrow." I bet so to. I smile and brush the hair out of her eyes. She is already falling asleep.

"Goodnight Abby." I whisper.

"Goodnight John."

Well long chapter, but what do you think? PLEASE REVIEW!


	5. eggs and conversation

Abby's POV

I wake up and I can feel my head pounding. I open my eyes to the brightest sun ever and make my way to the bathroom puking up everything but my stomach itself. I go in search for Carter and find him in the kitchen, making breakfast.

"Hey, I wasn't sure you were going to wake up today."

"My head is pounding."

"Well, that will teach you to drink that much again."

"Wow, your cheery this morning."

"Look, Ab I tried to talk to you last night but you were too out of it. What you did was messed. You shouldn't drink that much with people you barely know, especially Josh."

"Excuse me dad, but Josh is my boyfriend I think I can drink with him if I want, and I didn't mean to drink that much, I got a little out of control."

"Abby, you passed out and stopped breathing, I think it was a little more then out of control. Josh is a sleeze, you can't trust him."

"You dont even know him John."

"I know him better then you think."

"I dont want to talk about this Carter, what I decide to do with my life is my business. Thanks for helping me, but please stay out of it."

"Wow, you certainly have changed."

"I grew up."

"Yea could have fooled me."

"What is your problem! I thought everything was fine with us, just like old times lately. Why are you on my back all of the sudden about Josh. You never cared before who I dated."

"I am just looking out for you Ab, your my best friend. I just dont trust Josh at all, and I have my reasons."

"Please drop it Carter."

"Do you want some breakfast, you should eat something."

"Ew, I dont think so."

"Come on Abby." He sets the plate in front of me and the smell of eggs makes me gag.

"Carter! Now your just being mean." I whine.

"I think you deserve it." he teases.

"Hey!... Look thanks for last night Carter, really."

"Well I was thinking about leaving you there... but I decided I GUESS I should help you." he laughs and flings eggs at me.

"CARTER! You are so gonna get it." I chase after him and we end up running through the halls of the mansion laughing and sliding everywhere. I know that I really messed up last night, and I want to show Carter that he can trust me. Things are so great between us, I hope they stay this way.

Next chapter: The back to school dance is coming up... everyone scrambles to find a date, Maggie causes problems for Abby.

THOUGHTS?


	6. cuts, tears, and a little ivory dress

Not to long of an update... please review. I love reading your thoughts.

Carter's POV

As I walk into school, I cant help but search for Abby. I havent talked to her this weekend, not since the morning after the party. By the end of the day I have yet to see her and I start to worry, the only days she ever missed school was when maggie was off her meds, and maggie has been on her meds for two years now.

I decided to walk over to her house after school and I see her sitting on her front steps.

"Hey you, I missed you at school." She looks up at me and I see a huge gash across her face.

"Wow, what happened?"

"Maggie."

"She hit you?"

"No, nicked me with a nail file. She's off her meds again, got mad that I hadn't taken out the trash."

"God, ab... she was doing so good. I'm sorry, lets put something on that."

"No, she is inside. I dont want to talk to her...I just got back from a walk."

"Let's go to my place then. " I say and she grabs my hand as we make our way to the car.

When we get to my house I put some cream on her cut and a band aid, it isnt very big just pretty deep. I sit next to her on the bathtub edge and grab her hand.

"do you want to stay here tonight?"

"No, I have to go home.. If eric calls I want to be able to answer it.'

"Yea, I hear ya." We sit in silence for awhile when I decide to break the ice.

"Well wasn't to long ago we were sitting right here in this position. She laughs for a second and I smile glad that I have the power to make her feel better still.

"Thanks for everything Carter, especially last weekend."

"Don't worry about it, I would do anything for you Abby." She smiles at me and I squeeze her hand.

"So, Susan was telling me about the dance coming up... Back to school dance? Like anyone wants to celebrate going back." I laugh at there comment.

"Well, I did. You know I have summer... having to be here with the parentals."

"Yea I know.So are you going?"

"To the dance? Yea I was thinking about it."

"Wendall?"

"Um, I dont know... I guess. you?"

"Josh I think, he asked me but I never answered him."

"Abby, you cant trust him. You should really consider ditching that guy."

"Carter, dont."

"Alright, but dont say I didnt warn you."

"I gotta head home." she says standing up. Great I pissed her off. "See ya tomorrow."

"Ab wait, Im sorry... I dont mean to bug you about Josh."

"I know, its fine. I'll talk to you later." As she leaves I stay seated thinking about the dance. I hate Josh, and know he is playing with Abby. I wish she could see that. I think back to freshmen year. Abby and I went to the Winter ball together and she wore this light blue silk dress. She was so beautiful that night, the only time I ever saw her wear a dress. I cant wait to see her again in a dress.

It's Saturday night and everyone is heading over to my house for dinner and pictures before the dance. This week seemed to fly by as everyone scrambled to find last minute dates, like every year. Susan is taking Ian, mark didn't want to go to a high school dance, Luka is going with Anna, one of Wendall's friends, who is my date obviously and Abby is going with Josh, of course.

The 12 of us here line up in the backyard for pictures, Susan in pink, Wendall in yellow, and Abby and Ivory. I couldn't get over how great Abby looked, like a angel. Her hair was down and curled and her ivory strapless gown was flowing down to the floor. I couldn't stop staring at her, which went unnoticed by Wendall.

We were about to get into the limo and head to the dance when Maggie showed up. She kept yelling about missing pictures and Abby and I managed to pull her inside before anyone thought much of it. Nobody at school knows about Maggie's illness but me and the teachers of course.

"Abby, I never said you could go to this dance! Why didnt you tell me about pictures!"

"Mom, please just go home.. I will be home later."

"No you little brat! Get back here!" She screamed and all of the parents came inside to see what the commotion was about. Abby was horrified. She never liked people to know about maggie and now all of the parents would surely tell their kids.

"Carter... please help me get her out of here." she pleaded at me, the poor girl in tears.

"Maggie, why dont we go outback and take pictures so that Abby can go to the dance and have fun?"

"Pictures.. yea I want pictures." I pulled Abby out back for a couple of pictures for maggie and then we headed out, making sure Maggie was in her car and down the road. Abby was in tears and It took me awhile to get her to even go anymore but I managed to persuade her.

On the way to the dance I kept grabbing her hand and squeezing it, making sure she was ok. She would smile and nod everytime, knowing what I was doing... Wendall taking note also. When we finally arrived the gym was packed, everyone in their formal wear and I see out of the corner of my eye Josh in the back corner with Ashley, one of the slutty cheerleaders. He is grabbing and touching her, what a pig, Abby looks amazing tonight and he is all over some other girl in a neon orange dress the barley reaches her thigh.

I look around for Abby, hoping she doesnt see this, but too late. She is looking at Josh with tears in her eyes and anger written on her face. Oh damn. She is pissed. I make my way over to her but she is already on her way to Josh. The guy isnt even suttle about it, I mean you have to be looking to spot him, he is in the doorway and its dark but you can see him. I cant hear what she is saying but I see him trying to calm her down, even trying to hug her. What a Jackass. She slaps him one good across the face and walks out the door.

"Abby!" I run after her not before giving Josh the death glare. I find her sitting outside. I walk over and sit down next to her, not really knowing what to say.

"Hey, you ok?"

"Dont even say I told you so or I will hit you just as hard."

"Wouldn't think it." I say laughing.

"I was so stupid, I should have listened to you. I just thought he really liked me, I mean he seemed too, right?"

"He did, really. You couldn't have known Ab."

"I should have listened to you though, im sorry John."

"No big." I say and hug her. She wipes her eyes and I pull her to her feet.

"I really dont feel like going back in."

"Well, tough, you still owe me a dance."

"I do, since when?"

"Since...now!" She laughs as when walk back inside. I pull her close as we slow dance and I can see Wendall out of the corner of my eye steaming mad. But I dont care. Abby needs me right now, and I wanted to dance with her, she looks so beautiful. I am almost a little scared at how natural this feels, my hands on her lower back, her head on my shoulder. I am slowly finding myself more attracted to my best friend, and Im terrified.

So what do you think? More updates coming. Please REVIEW!


	7. Hanging by a moment

short update...please review!

Carter's POV

The DJ has already played three songs and Abby and I are still dancing together. I know that I should be paying attention to my date, but I can't take my eyes off Abby. She looks absolutely beautiful tonight and I know how seeing Josh with another girl must of hurt, so I want to make sure she has a good time. Right now I am laughing hysterically and dancing to the electric slide. I really have missed having Abby around, we always manage to have a good time.

As the end of the dance approaches, I am dancing with Wendall and I can see Luka and Abby dancing. All of the sudden I have an incredible wave of jealousy come over me. What is wrong with me? Abby is my best friend, and I have a girlfriend for crying out loud. I am being ridiculous. Still as much as I tell myself that, the jealousy doesn't subside. I wonder if Abby still likes Luka, I mean they did date Sophomore year, oh my god Carter shut up.

"Carter...HELLO?"

"Sorry, did you say something?"

"What is up with you? You haven't been paying attention to anything I said all night."

"Sorry, I'm just worried about Abby."

"Look, what Josh did was stupid but you warned her, and I mean she seems to be doing fine."

"I know, I'm just looking out for her."

"Well how about looking at me for a change?...Carter? JOHN!" Yep, definitely wasn't paying attention again.

"What?"

"I'm going to go outside with Anna, when you decide you want to talk to your girlfriend let me know." and she walks off. I don't go after her though, she is actually getting quite annoying.

"Hey guys." I say walking over to Abby and Luka.

"Hey Carter."

"Mind if I cut in?"

"Sure, I gotta find Anna anyways."

"Outside." I say pointing to the doors and taking Abby from Luka.

"You seem to be having fun now."

"Yea, thanks for cheering me up. I'm glad that I decided to stay."

"Me too." We stare at each other for a few minutes before looking away uncomfortably. What is going on here. Am I falling for Abby?

She leans in closer to me and puts her head against my chest. I place my hands on her hips and we dance to the music, everyone seems to fade. It is amazing how I feel when I am with her. Things have definitely changed between us.

We all pile into the limo after the dance and head home, Abby and I being last along with Wendall. I walk wendall to the door and I can tell that she is upset.

"I'm sorry if I was a little off tonight."

"Yea, Carter look... I know."

"What?"

"I know... that you have feelings for Abby."

"Abby is my best frie-"

"No, stop it. Stop lying to me and to yourself. I know you like her and as much as I care about you, I know this isn't going to work."

"Wendall come on."

"No its ok, tell her how you feel." she says before kissing me one last time and walking inside. I slowly make my way back to the limo, to Abby and I feel so nervous and yet so relieved. I really liked Wendall but she is right. Somewhere along these past couple of weeks I fell for my best friend.

I climb back into the car and I see that Abby is roaming through some CD's.

"Find anything good?"

"Wow, you scared me... umm, I found some Lifehouse..." she says with a smile. Oh great.

"Ab, you know I hate Lifehouse."

"No, you secretely love it. I know you do." She pops it in the CD player and starts singing.

"desperate for changing, starving for truth, im closer to where I started!" okay now she is being crazy, but I cant stop laughing and soon enough I am singing too.

"I'm falling even more in love with you, letting go of all I held onto, Im standing here until you make me move, hanging by a moment here with you.."

We end up singing and laughing all the way back to her house and I can't get over how much I missed this. Just me and Abby. Best Friends, and maybe more soon.

Love reading the review! Keep them up!


	8. Buses, Boats, and blushing babes

pretty long update for ya... enjoy

Abby's POV

The dance this weekend was great. Things definitely got off to a rough start with Josh, what an idiot I was. I should have listened to John, but then again when do I ever listen to anyone? After that whole fiasco I had a great time, Carter really cheered me up. I love that we are so close again, we always have so much fun.

Right now I am packing for the school camping trip. Yes camping, for school. All of the Biology classes are going on the trip this week for three days to study the 'wildlife'. It is suppose to be the start of our big project due at the end of the quarter. I dont mind camping though, and tons of people are going so it should be fun. Maybe not for Susan though, she hates the outdoors.

"Abby! Susan is here!" I hear maggie yell. I finally got her to take her meds, and although its only the second day she is alot better.

"Hey Susan come on up!" I yell from the banister. She comes running up with her ten suitcases in hand.

"Are you bringing all of that tomorrow?"

"Yea... why?" I giggle to myself and help her pull them into my room. She is staying over tonight and we are leaving for the trip tomorrow bright and early.

"Well Ms. Lockhart, I see you aren't far behind on luggage.." Well, maybe I was a little overboard.

"Uh, help me... I dont know what to bring."

"I thought you always used to camp. What about all the trips with your dad and Eric?"

"Yea, but that was years ago."

"Well make sure to bring something sexy for Carter."

"Susan!" I throw a pillow at her and she starts laughing.

"Well, what was going on with you guys Saturday? He was all over you."

"No he wasnt... was he?"

"Uh, yea I think so. I just figured with that and him and wendall breaking up-"

"What? They broke up!"

"He didnt tell you? Oh yea, he definitely likes you."

"Because he didnt tell me?"

"Yea, I mean they probably broke up because of you... why else wouldn't he have told you. I mean you guys seem to be just as close as before."

"I dont know." I say and continue packing.. maybe Susan is right. Does Carter have feelings for me?

The next morning we are packed and ready to go. As we board the bus I see Carter and Luka talking and walk over.

"Hey guys."

"Abby, hey. Didnt think you were going to show." Carter says while nudging me in the arm.

"Well blame Barbie." I say laughing as Susan sticks out her tongue at me.

"We still have to check in, be right back."

"We are going to get on the bus.. save you a seat?"

"Yea, thanks."

The entire bus ride I spend sleeping, I guess Susan and I shouldn't have stayed up so late. The campsite is three hours away and we still have a half hour. I finally wake up when our expert bus driver slams into a pothole. I didnt realize I was sleeping on Carters shoulder.

"Rise and Shine."

"Sorry, you could have pushed me off."

"Nah, its fine. You alive now?"

"ha.ha. very funny. We were up pretty late."

"I see. So how is maggie? I didnt get to talk to you yesterday."

"Um, she is better, alot better. I just hope it stays that way... thanks for asking." he smiles and I smile back, before I start diggin for my walkman.

"Whatcha listening to?" I hand him an earphone and he gets a big grin on his face.

"Ah, Journey... finally some taste." I smack him in the arm and we sit there listening to my CD. I wonder what it's going to be like spending three days straight with Carter. I mean with everything that has been going on these past few weeks, the more I think about it the more Susan's words make sense. What if Carter does like me. For years that is all I wanted, now it just scares me to death.

We pull up to the campsite and set up our tents. We are given some free lounging time when we get there for an hour so Susan drags me down to the lake. It is actually pretty warm considering its the end of September in Chicago. I am wearing my black strapless bikini...after hours of persuading... and susan is wearing the brightest pink suit I have ever seen. All of Josh's friends keep throwing us little comments, something about boat babes. I am so glad to see Carter and Luka, I am ready to punch these jerks.

Carter and Luka come down to the dock with a bunch of people and we all end up going out in the canoes. Carter and I racing Luka and Susan. We get out into the middle of the lake and Carter decides he wants to be cute, standing up and rocking the boat trying to scare me.

"Carter, knock it off. I will kill you if I fall in."

"Come on Abby, live a litt-" BAM! we both hit the freezing water.

"CARTER!" I come up screaming and he is laughing trying to flip the canoe back over.

"you are so dead. It is freeeezing."

"Sorry, I didnt actually mean to tip it. I am trying to get it back over."

"Dont bother lets just swim over to the sandbar. You are not going to get that thing back over, its huge." I tease, I guess he agrees and we swim over.

"Abby?" he pulls on my arm as we reach shallow water.

"What?" I say looking back. He just stares at me and I don't know if I am suppose to say something or not.

"Carter.."

"You look really pretty." Okay, wasn't expecting that. I know I am completely blushing right now but I cant help it. That is all I have ever wanted to hear from him.

I just smile and he smiles back then continues swimming. Way to leave me completely confused. It looks like Carter really might have feelings for me, but how can I know for sure. I dont want to ask him and make a complete fool out of myself. Looks like I will have to wait and see.

Please Review!


	9. Promise

ABBY's POV

It's Friday afternoon and I have just gotten home from school. Susan has been acting really weird the past couple of days, she keeps asking if I have something to tell her. I really dont know what she is talking about. Susan isn't the only one, Carter seems to have been avoiding me... especially when I'm with Susan.. I wonder what those two are up to.

I do my homework and some laundry, it's around 4pm and I have to rake the backyard before Maggie gets home or she is going to flip. She is on her meds, but she still is really emotional. Considering I was suppose to do it last night, but got lazy, I decide I better get out there before it gets dark.

It's about 4:30 and I am pretty much done. I have three garbage bags full and I more pile to go. Earphones blaring I don't hear Carter come up from behind me until he touches my arm.

"Jesus! you scared me." I say taking off my headphones and placing them on the deck.

"Sorry... doing some landscaping?" he teases.

"Very funny, no... maggie will have my head if I dont finish this."

"Gotcha... want some help?"

"Um, sure." He picks up a rake on the side of the house and starts raking the leaves into the bag. I go back to raking and pay no attention till I feel that entire bag of leaves pouring all over my head.

"CARTER!" I hear him laughing so I pick up so leaves and throw them at him. Before I know it.. all the leaves are scattered all over the yard again. I dont care though, we are having a ball.

CARTER's POV

I intended on coming over to Abby's to talk to her about my new infatuation, but I just seem to keep avoiding it. I decide to help her rake a bit and we end up having a huge leaf fight before I tackle her into a leave pile. Lying over her we are both breathing heavy and staring into each others eyes. I have to say how incredibly uncomfortable this would normally be, but I am so concentrated on her eyes, I am not even thinking.

I lean in slowly and capture her lips with mine. I can tell she is surprised, but she reciprocates and before you know it we are making out in a pile of leaves. Not quite as romantic as I pictured, yet so us. I have one hand holding me up so I dont suffocate her, while the other is cupping her face. I have to say that she is an amazing kisser, I have never experienced such a passionate and special kiss before.

It feels like forever, yet has probably only been seconds, when we are interrupted by Maggie yelling to Abby.

"Abby, Susan is on the phone!" she yells out the sliding door, thankfully not looking. I don't really want to explain this to her mom, and I doubt Abby does either.

Startled, we break our kiss and stare at each other for a second, breathing hard and almost mirroring only a minute earlier. We are sitting up more now but I am still on top of her. She looks down, obviously uncomfortable.

"um, I should-"

"Yea, yea sorry." I climb off her and let her go inside. She walks to the door and I can see her finger touching her lips.

I follow her inside after a minute and wait on the couch until she is done. My palms are sweating and I think I might faint. What do I say now? I didn't even tell her I liked her I just dove right in. What an idiot. What if she doesnt feel the same? This makes things totally awkward. I think about leaving but I know I can't.

Maggie walks upstairs and Abby walks into the living room hanging up the phone, and sits down next to me, playing with her hands. She obviously is as nervous as I am.

"So-" we say simultaneously.

"Go ahead." she says.

"No, you go." I counter, she looks at me with an unsure face and she opens her mouth to speak but I interrupt.

"Ab, I don't want things to be weird. I... I don't know if I should have kissed you, cause I dont know how you feel about me. But I dont regret it, and that was the best kiss I have ever had. I know that we are best friends, and if that is all you want to be then I will have to live with that, but I dont know.. just lately, I.. I just want to be more then that." I realize that I am completely rambling and I turn 10 shades redder then I already am.

"John, I have wanted to be more then just friends for so long, but I just don't want to lose what we have. You are my best friend and you always have been. What happens if we go out and then break up... are we going to talk to each other.. would you hate me cause I dont think-" By this point she is rambling so much I cut her off with a kiss. She looks at me and calms down.

"Abby, no matter what happens I could never hate you. and I know that this seems really risky but thats because we could be something amazing. I'm willing to take that risk. Are you?"

She looks at me dumbfounded and I can tell that she is feeling overwhelmed right now. I don't blame her, I have known her for years... this decision will change our entire relationship.

"John I-"

"Wait, maybe I should leave, and you can think about-"

"No, I want to be with you. I know that. I'm just scared, this is so new. I mean I have liked you for so long, but I never had to face that. I mean you never felt the same way." she says looking down almost embarrassed.

"I know. and I'm scared too, but you are not going to lose me." I grab her hand and give it a squeeze.

"me either." she says and I smile before giving her another quick but gentle kiss. I feel like the butterflies are going to come bursting out of my stomach and I want to stay kissing her forever.

"So..?" I'm not really sure what we just agreed on here. Am I suppose to ask her to be my girlfriend, or is that just backtracking now?

"I want to be with you, but I want us to promise to stay friends, even if we break up. I dont want to lose a 14 year friendship. You mean so much to me." she says.

"Promise." I say lean into kiss her.

"Promise." she whispers and kisses me. I think I am in heaven right now.

okay... so they are finally together! I hope you liked it... please review.


	10. White Horse Fairytale

ABBY's POV

As soon as Carter left last night I immediately called Susan back and told her what had happened. I think she blew my ear drum screaming as loud as she did. I can't believe how great everything is. For as long as I can remember all I have wanted was the attention of John Carter, and now I finally have it.

Right now I am getting ready for our big first date. When Carter suggested it I told him that we didn't really qualify for that, I mean we know everything about each other and more, what is the point of a first date? He was so persuading though and I am scrambling to find something to wear before he gets here. He wouldn't tell me where we are going so I have no clue what I am suppose to wear.

I decide on a pair of tight jeans and a black sweater, my hair is down and wavy and my make-up is perfect. I am so nervous right now I can feel my palms sweating. I don't really know what to expect here, it seems so weird to be going on a date with Carter.

The door bell rings and I run to get it before Maggie can, she was so excited when I told her about John and I, I don't want her to make this anymore awkward. Luckily she is sitting on the back deck talking to Eric on the phone.

"Hey, I wasn't sure if you were coming." I joke as I open the door and he laughs. He is standing there with a single white rose. I am totally blushing now.

"Well I had to make sure everything was all set. This is for you." he says handing me the flower and kissing me lightly.

"So where are we going?" I ask hoping I can get him to slip up.

"Nope. You will have to wait and see." he says grabbing my hand as we make our way to his jeep. Thank god he didn't bring the limo.

We drive for awhile and I think he is lost but he seems to be knowing where he is going. We pull onto a long dirt road leading to a farm... a farm? Not quite what I was hoping for.

"here we are." He says as he leads me up to the stables.

"Carter, what are we doing?" I ask trying to keep up with him. He opens the doors and leads me over to two horses at the end. They are both white as snow.

"We are going horseback riding."

"Ok.. I haven't been in years."

"I know... but, do you remember when we were I think nine, and your mom was in the hospital?"

"Yea, I had to stay at your house. Gamma had a movie night with us." I say smiling.

"Well, that night we watched that movie with the prince and princess, and those two horses you loved so much." I smile and shake my head, I can't believe he remembers that. I finally realize what he is doing. I was so upset that night, that Carter finally watched a "girly" movie with me where a prince and princess were riding these two white horses into the sunset. I told him that was my dream.

"and you told me that some day you wanted to ride horses just like that and walk into the sunset, cause that meant happily ever after, and that's all you wanted was a happily ever after."

"You thought I was crazy." I laugh.

"Yes I did." he laughs too. He never believed in 'happily ever after' once Bobby got sick. We were only eight or nine when he was diagnosed, we thought he was going to make it but he only died a few years later.

"Carter, I can't believe you remember that, let alone that you planned all this. Thank you." I say and he kisses my hand.

"There's more... come on or we'll miss it." I can't imagine what he had planned but we climb onto the horses and start riding up this big hill. When we reach the top my mouth drops, there is the most beautiful view. We climb off the horse and I walk over to Carter.

"This is amazing." I say beaming. It is so beautiful. A complete view of the sunset.

"I couldn't train the horses to walk into the sunset, so this is the best I could do." he jokes. Best he could do? This is wonderful.

"It's great, thank you." I say kissing him. He pulls out a blanket and we sit down watching the sunset. This is the most romantic thing anyone has ever done for me, and I can't get over how happy I am right now just laying here with Carter.

On the drive back home I find myself becoming sad. I don't want this to end, and I was the one who didn't want to do this in the first place. He walks me to the door and gives me the most incredible kiss ever. I walk inside and after much hounding from my mom for details I go upstairs and fall onto my bed. That was the most amazing date I have ever had. It looks like things between Carter and I just might work out.


	11. Jealousy

Abby's POV

Walking into school and hearing everyone talking about Carter and I made me a little bit uncomfortable I have to admit. I wasn't expecting for people to make such a big deal out of us dating, and I think I might hit the next person that asks me if we are REALLY going out. Yes, we are. Get over it. I mean I know that all the girls really like John, and that we have been friends for so long that it might be a little weird, but do people have nothing better to do?

It has only been a little over a week since Carter and I made things official, and no one knew anything until Susan blabbed about our date. Things have been going so great for us though, it is amazing how quickly we got over the awkward stage, Susan gets 'grossed out' because we apparently can't 'keep out hands off each other'. I love it though, I'm so glad we stopped playing games and just admitted we liked each other.

It is now Friday, and as I am sitting here waiting for Luka, all I want is to be hanging out with John. Carter and I were so excited to go to psych class tuesday because we were starting the family unit, and that meant the pretend career, husband, and kids. Normally I would have that project, but we thought it would be fun to do it together. Then as we are sitting there laughing and joking the teacher announces that I am paired with Luka. Great. I am still friends with Luka and everything, but ever since we broke up last year things are just a bit awkward, and it doesn't help that Carter thinks that he still has feelings for me. I don't think I believe that, but dealing with a jealous boyfriend isn't that fun.

The door bell rings and I walk downstairs to answer it, expecting to see Luka. I open the door and am surprised to see Carter standing there.

"What are you doing here?"

"Can't stop by and see my girlfriend?" he says and kisses me. Ha, like I believe that.

"John, you know I have to work on my project today. I told you that.. you are completely spying."

"Hey! I am not spying, I am just... here for intimidation." he jokes but I don't laugh. He has been acting rudely to Luka all week and there is no reason for it. I don't remember him ever being this jealous about anything or anyone in the past.

"You are not going to sit here and throw dirty looks all afternoon when we are trying to work. I already told you Luka and I just aren't like that anymore. You are being stupid."

"I know I'm sorry, I just I don't know I don't trust anyone with you. and I still say he likes you, you aren't going to change my mind about that."

"Fine, but you still can't stay. I'll call you when we are done." I say smiling. I can't stay mad at him.

"Alright." he says sighing jokingly. He knows nothing is going to happen, I think he feels like he needs to mark his territory to Luka or something, I don't understand boys.

" I'll talk to you later." he says and kisses me.

"Bye." I say kissing him back and he leaves. I don't think he realizes how much I don't want this either.

I barely make it upstairs and into my room before the doorbell rings again, Luka. We work in the living room, trying to budget our fake house and cars. Growing up sucks I laugh to myself as I sit here.

"So have you decided on any colleges yet?" He asks trying to make small talk, this whole...26 minutes, has felt like a lifetime. I don't know why we can't seem to find nothing to talk about, we were getting along fine at the dance. Maybe because we weren't sitting here alone.

"Um, I haven't really narrowed it down but I am looking." Which is true. I am having a hard time deciding where I want to go, but I know I am going somewhere. This is my chance to get away from maggie.

"Yea, me either." he says.

"I thought your dad wanted you to go back to Croatia for college?" I say confused.

"He does, but I don't think I really want to."

"Oh." he doesn't seem to really want to talk about it.

"So you and Carter?" great, another one. I guess I can't hit him.

"Yep."

"I didn't think I would ever see the day." he laughs.

"Yea, me either."

"Well, thats cool. Carter's a ok guy." he says emphasizing the ok. What is that suppose to mean?

"Yea, things are really good." he looks at me for a second and nods. He doesn't seem to want to talk about this either as he raises his eyebrows quickly. Why does he ask questions if he doesn't want to discuss it.

"How long have you guys been together... wasn't he with Wendall?"

"Yea, well he was... but I don't know they broke up after that dance a few weeks ago."

"Oh, I thought they really liked each other." I look at him for a second and decide not to answer. I don't know, it just seems like he is trying to piss me off or something.

"So you guys got together after that?"

"Well, it wasn't before if that is what your thinking." I say a little mad.

"No, no sorry I didnt mean for it to sound like that-"

"It's alright... it's only been a week or two." We stop talking for awhile after that, besides stuff for the project. He kind of seems mad, which is odd considering he was the one who just called me a home wrecker.

After about another hour he decides to head home and I walk him over to the door.

He turns and looks at me for a minute and I am getting a little uncomfortable.

"Do you ever think about us?" What? Where did that come from.

"What do you mean?"

"I don't know, I just... I've been thinking about when we were together ever since you came back. It's weird, I still can't come up with a reason for why we broke up." he says. I stare at him for a second and debate about what to say. I don't really want to say the wrong thing.

"Well, I moved away." I say dismissing it.

"Yea, well you came back." he says lifting his head up slowly and staring at me.

"Well, it's been awhile... and we are different people now Luka, I mean we barely talk anymore... besides thats in the past." I say trying to laugh it off, hoping he does the same.

"Yea, right. Well I'll see you tomorrow."

"See ya."

Sorry it took so long to update... what do you think?


	12. Secret kisses

Heres an update for everyone... sorry about the wait, I needed to get my other story done.

Abby's POV

I have to say that things between Luka and I have gotten much better since last time. Sitting here working on this stupid project, we are actually laughing and having fun.

"So are you going to the halloween dance?" he asks me.

"Um, I don't know, I haven't given it much thought actually."

"You should go, it was a lot of fun last year."

"Yea, I'll have to see what Carter thinks." I say and he nods slowly.

We decide to take a little break and get a snack. I walk into the kitchen following Luka and he goes over to the sink to wash some glasses for us.

"Where's your dad? I haven't seen him at all since I have been back."

"He's been working a lot. He is actually in Croatia for a few days right now, my grandmother is sick."

"Aw, I'm sorry."

"Yea, hopefully she'll be alright." he smiles at me and I smile back turning my head the other way, pretending to be looking around. I get kind of embarrassed when he looks at me that way.

"Hey Abby?" he asks and I turn to face him getting sprayed in the face with water.

"LUKA!" I yell and grab the faucet hose from him. I spray him back as he runs into the other room. I run after him and end up sliding right into him, both of us crashing to the floor.

"Are you ok?" he asks crawling over to me. I am laughing to hard to answer and when I look up he is staring at me, two inches away from me.

He leans in and kisses me on the lips but I pull back pushing him away. So much for being friends again.

"What are you doing! Luka, I have a boyfriend!"

"I know, I know I'm sorry..geez, I shouldn't have done that Abby. I don't want things to be weird now."

"I should go."

"Abby wait." he says getting up and following me, trying to get me to stay.

"Luka, I really like you. As a friend. and I'm going out with Carter you know that!"

"I'm really sorry, I just... I don't know we were getting along so good, and I still like you alot Abby."

"I'm sorry, but I'm with John... I should, I should go." I say and walk out the door. How am I suppose to explain this to Carter? He is going to freak.

------------------------------------------------------

I drive over to Susan's and tell her about Luka and I. She completely flips of course, she loves the soap opera love triangles. I think she is the wrong person to be talking to about this.

"Susan, you aren't helping me here... Luka kissing me is suppose to be a BAD thing."

"Ok, sorry. It's just... don't tell me it isn't great to have two guys fighting for you. That's so hot."

"No, No its not. I really like Carter, and he kept telling me Luka liked me but I just ignored it. Now what am I going to do."

"Well, it's not like Carter has to know." she says slowly.

"No way, I have to tell him. I have never lied to Carter. Besides, at our school he is bound to find out."

"Well just make sure Luka doesn't tell anyone, and then know one will find out. Look telling Carter will just piss him off. What is the point, I mean the kiss was harmless. and you told Luka it wasn't going to happen. So... why tell him?"

"I don't know, I don't like that idea of lying to him."

"What he doesn't know won't hurt him..." she says and leaves to answer the phone. I sit there on her bed wondering what I should do. She is right, if he doesn't know he doesn't have to get mad over something so stupid and little. I still don't know if I am even capable of lying to Carter, he knows me way too well. This really sucks.

Please Review!


	13. Guilty Conscience

Abby's POV

Walking into school the next day, my stomach is in knots. I haven't told Carter what happened and I don't know if I am going to. I feel so bad about lying but I know Carter, and I know he will make this into a big deal when it really isn't.

I see Carter standing by my locker talking to Susan and I freeze. Is she telling him what happened? No, god Abby chill out... I really need to tell him.

"Hey!" Susan yells.

"Hey, how late am I?" I ask nervously, Eric called this morning so I left for school extremely late.

"Bell hasn't even rang yet... i'll see you guys in class." she says and walks away. Thanks a lot Susan.

"Hey, you." Carter says placing his hands on my waist and kissing me. God I melt every time he does that.

"Well, good morning to you too." I say jokingly and he laughs. Right at that moment I spot Luka walk by and I almost feel a little paranoid. We are doing our presentation today and we aren't really on the best terms. He called and left me a message last night apologizing but I didn't call him back.

"Abby? Hello?"

"Sorry." I say blushing.

"Come on let's get to class." he says grabbing my hand and I lean into him walking side by side.

---------------------------------------------------

I book it out of Psychology, hoping to escape the questions I am about to be asked. No such luck.

"Abby! Hey, wait up." John yells. I turn and face him, it's not like I didn't hear him, and I know what he is about to say. That presentation had guilty written all over. Every time one of us talked the other interrupted and we would start mumbling and when our hands touched we freaked...uh.

"What was up with you in there? Is everything ok between you guys, you really looked like you would rather kill then be standing up there." he laughs, but he doesn't know how right he is.

"Everything is fine, we just aren't getting along that well."

"What's up? You never said anything to me."

"Well, I didn't see any reason to. It's nothing Carter."

"Alright.. I won't push." he says backing off and I smile and kiss him.

"We still on for tonight?" I ask.

"Yea, I wanted to ask you something though... the halloween dance? Were you interested in going, cause we never really talked about it."

I pause for a second and think about how awkward it would be with Luka there. Then again, we go to the same school, we are going to be seeing each other no matter what we do to avoid it. If this stupid kiss is no big deal, I need to stop freaking out so much.

"Um, yea why not."

"Alright, I gotta get to class but I'll pick you up at 6 ok?"

"Sure." he kisses me and then runs off to class. I feel so bad for lying to him and I can tell I won't last long. I need to just tell him, I mean it didn't mean anything... hopefully he can see it that way. I'm not counting on it.

"Hey, spilled your guts yet?" Susan asks coming up from behind me.

"No, and quiet down."

"Sorry... look Abby you need to chill out. You are the only one making this into a big deal."

"Well, I don't like lying to Carter. I never have and didn't think I ever would. Besides I haven't talked to Luka yet, I'm freaking out that he told someone."

"I doubt it.. and if you're so worried go find him and talk to him."

"Do you know where he is?"

"Chemistry I think... I gotta go, good luck!" she says and walks away. I take a deep breath and walk towards the labs. I see Luka walking into the classroom and I grab him before he enters.

"Abby? What are you doing?"

"Can we talk for a sec?" I say pulling my hand off his arm.

"Yea, sure." he says and closes the door.

"Listen, I just wanted to ask you... um... have you... told anyone?"

"No.. have you?"

"No. I just, I'm not sure if I am going to tell Carter or not. So I would appreciate it if you didn't say anything to anyone."

"Oh, ok... well, why wouldn't you tell him?

"I just don't think he needs to know. It was no big deal, and he is just doing to get really pissed so... trust me I'm doing YOU a favor." I joke trying to lighten the mood. I mean it though, Carter would probably go after Luka in a heartbeat.

"I am sorry Abby-"

"I know, let's just forget about it ok." I say uncomfortably.

"Right. Friends?"

"Sure. Friends."

Please review!


	14. Diner Confessions

Glad you are loving it! Heres the next chapter

Abby's POV

After school I went home to get ready for my date with Carter. I feel so nervous, but I know that I have to tell him. I can't lie about it, hopefully he will won't over react. We end up going to the dinner by the river, we have been going there since we were kids. Half way through dinner I am fidgeting and playing with my silverware. I can't help, but I am pretty sure Carter notices how uncomfortable I am.

"Hey, is everything ok? You seem kind of off." he says reaching for my hand. We have been together for about a month now, so for me to be acting this nervous... well he knows something is up.

"Yea, I'm just a little nervous-"

"Why?" he asks before I can finish my sentence.

"Well, I have to tell you something but please don't freak."

"Alright... is it that bad?" he jokes.

"No, it really isn't a big deal...but.. the other day when I was at Luka's he, um-"

"Hey guys!" Susan says walking up. Nice timing.

"hey susan, what's up?" Carter asks.

"Just grabbing some take-out, thought I would say hi... you guys ok, you're looking a little tense." she laughs but I give her a look to tell her that I am trying to tell him about Luka.

"Well, I will leave you guys alone, I gotta head home. Call me later Ab!" she yells back to me walking out the door.

"So what were you saying?" John asks looking back at me. "Something about Luka, hey is this why about you guys acted so weird at school...I thought you said it was nothing?" he says almost sounding concerened about my relationship with Luka. Great, this is not the time to get nice about Luka.

"Yea, um, the other day when we were working on our project... he, well he kissed me." I say slowly and breathe out in relief, glad that is out in the open.

"He what?" he says looking at me with disgust.

"It was nothing Carter, really but I thought you should know. I pushed him off, I told him that it wasn't going to happen. He understood..." he is looking out the window, clearly pissed. " He knows that we are nothing more then friends. I'm with you." I say and reach for his hand but he pulls away.

"When did this happen?"

"A couple of days ago-"

"Why didn't you tell me! You have been acting like everything is just normal and dandy.. you kissed another guy!"

"I didn't kiss him, he kissed me... and I pushed him away!... look can we talk about this somewhere else?" I ask noticing the stares I am getting. Great, Abby the town whore.

He throws down some money and walks out without answering me. I take it as a yes and follow him grabbing my coat and his that he left behind. He walks across the street and leans over the railing looking at the river.

"Carter, I'm sorry I didn't tell you, but I just didn't want you to over react... which you are clearly doing by the way." I say trying to get him to look at me.

"Abby some other guy kissed you! No, not even some other guy. Luka, your ex. I have been saying for weeks that he wanted to get back with you and you wouldn't listen. Now you're lying to me for him and-"

"I wasn't lying Carter, I was just waiting for the right chance to tell you. I didn't want you to freak out like this. It meant nothing, and he knows that."

"I think I have a right to be mad-"

"I know that, I just don't want you to make this bigger then it needs to be. You are going to mad and jealous and whatever, I know that. But please, don't over analyze this Carter. I am with you. I don't want you to be mad at me for something I had no control over. I didn't know he was going to kiss me, and when he did I pushed him off. I told him I didn't like him like that." I yell a little, getting my point across. After a minute of silence I think he is about to walk away but he speaks up.

"I'm... I'm not mad at you. I was, at first. But I'm not. I just can't stand thinking about it, and I really wish you had told me."

"I know, I'm sorry." I grab his hand and he pulls me into a hug.

"It's not that I don't trust you, or that I think you would cheat on me or anything like that. I don't know I just, I really like you Abby.. I never thought things could be this good, ya know? We were so scared to try and now I'm scared to lose what we have. And I guess that thought of Luka kissing you, uh it just pisses me off. I knew it, ya know. I knew he still liked you! You don't know how bad I want to beat the shit out of him right now." he laughs sarcastically and turns the other way.

"hey." I say and turn him around. I kiss him, long and slow... showing that he isn't going to loose me. It's amazing how it feels like we have been together so long, yet it has been little over a month. I guess it's because we have known each other so long. Not to mention that even though we weren't officially together, well, Carter and I have pretty much been together for years.

He hugs me tightly and then kisses me. I am so glad he didn't get mad at me. I knew that I needed to tell him, now I can only hope that he doesn't go after Luka.

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	15. Rocky

Pretty long update!

Carter's POV

I have to admit, walking into school today isn't easy. After Abby told me about her and Luka last night, all I could think about was kicking the crap out of him. I knew he liked her, and I can't blame him, but who does that? He knows we are together, not to mention I thought we were friends. I really hope he doesn't try to talk to me.

I see Abby at her locker, and I almost stop dead in my tracks when I see Luka standing there, hovering over her. Who the hell does this guy think he is. I see her laugh and I can't help but get extremely mad, jealous, annoyed... what ever this feeling is. I walk right on past them when I hear her call after me. She catches up to me and pulls my arm to get me to stop.

"Carter, hey! slow down." she laughs, I play along like I didn't see her five seconds ago talking to that scum bag.

"hey."

"are you ok? you walked right past me."

"Yea, well you seemed kind of busy." I say bitterly, and I know it, but I can't seem to get over it.

"Carter. Look, I was just telling Luka that I talked to the teacher and she said we did really well on our project."

"Well I'm glad you did good you were kind of worried." I say acting like I am not holding my fist back at this very moment. She knows, she always knows what I'm thinking.

"Hey, look at me... I thought we were ok." She says looking up at me, her big brown eyes worried.

"We are, but that doesn't mean I want to see you guys together, he is lucky I don't pound his ass."

"John, come on. We talked about this last night. It was nothing, and he is really sorry."

"Yea, I bet. Why the hell would he be sorry?"I say yelling at her a bit unintentionally. She is caught by surprise I would say by the way she leans back. I look down feeling like an idiot but she lifts my head, placing her hand under my chin.

"I'm yours. You don't have to worry about it, and if you want I'll keep the talking to a absolutely necessary level." she jokes a little trying to cheer me up. I smile and kiss her, I can't be mad at her, and I shouldn't be... Luka on the other hand, we still need to have a long talk.

"Come on let's go." she says and we walk hand in hand to class.

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I walk out of last period thanking god that the day is over. All I want is to get out of here. I walk to my locker and begin putting my books away when I feel a shoulder on my hand.

"ha, man you really don't want to be talking to me right now." I say to Luka.

"Look, Carter Abby told me that she told you what happened. I just wanted to apologize, It was really stupid on my part and I feel really bad."

I turn and look at him for a second, not only does he not sound sincere but the look on his face makes me want to kill him.

"Get away from me."

"Carter-" he says and puts his hand on my arm. I shove him off me and into the locker.

"I said get away from me Luka. Trust me, I am not into talking right now, especially with you. If you think that I believe anything that just came out of your mouth-"

"I am sorry Carter."

"I don't wanna hear it." I say and turn back to my books. I can see him standing there still in the corner of my eye and I am starting to get really agitated.

"Well, if you don't want to talk to me that's fine, and if you don't believe me I don't really care. I like Abby. and I am sorry for kissing her while you guys were together, but I'm not sorry for kissing her. I'm not going to pretend I don't like her, I mean we did date for almost a year, and just because you finally got your act together, doesn't mean that Abby belongs with you-" before he can finish I slam my fist in his face and he stammers backwards.

"Who the hell do you think you are. You have got some serious balls to be saying the shit you just said man. Abby and I are together, don't you touch her again." I say and shove him.

He shoves back at me and we start a nice little brawl in the middle of the hallway. Everyone crowds around us, gossiping trying to figure out what is going on. Luka and I are usually really friendly with each other. I hear someone says that he slept with Abby and I freak out. I start pounding into him harder, those thoughts running through my head.

Abby comes running up, seeing the big crowd and sees us fighting. She tries to step in between us, attempting to pry us apart.

"Hey! What the hell are you guys doing!... Stop it!" she yells and hugs her self to me walking me backwards, knowing Luka won't come near me if she is in the middle. We are both breathing heavily and my knuckles are bleeding along with his forehead.

"What is wrong with you two!" Abby yells and he looks away, Susan coming up trying to get him to stop touching his cut. Abby looks at me, clearly pissed and I look away. I know I shouldn't of hit him, but damn did it feel good. He deserved it, if only she heard what he said.

"Carter... look at me." she says and cups my face with her hands. "Are you ok?" She asks nodding at my hand.

"It's nothing."

"What happened? Why were you guys going at it like that!" I know she is mad, Abby hates violence, mostly from growing up with Maggie.

"The asshole was bragging. He has the guts to tell me he doesn't regret kissing you then he is looking to get beat up." I say and spit out blood from my bleeding gums.

"Carter, you should go to the nurse... the both of you should." she says looking at me then Luka.

"I'm fine, no thanks to you." he says looking at me.

"You deserved it."

"Hey, I was only trying to apologize."

"What! the hell you were." I say walking towards him, him doing the same.

"You guys stop it!" Abby says walking in between us. She pulls me back hugging herself to me once again and this time I hug her back burying my face in her shoulder. I don't care, let him rant all he wants... I am with Abby and I am the one holding her right now. He gives me a dirty look and Susan pulls him away to the nurse I presume.

"Are you sure you're ok?"

"I'm fine, I'm sorry about all this. I lost my temper.. but if you had been here and heard what he was saying, you would know he deserved it." she looks at me for a second and shakes her grinning.

"Men." she laughs. I cup her face and draw her into a hug.

"I'm sorry." I whisper.

"I know, but if you pull that again I'll be the one kicking your ass." she jokes. I laugh and kiss her forehead.

"I'm serious Carter. I thought this was settled. You didn't need to go fight him, you're lucky a teacher didn't come out." She's right, getting suspended would do great for college applications. I can't let him get to me.

"Come on, let's get you home and cleaned up rocky." she says pulling me towards the doors. I know she is mad, and that I am getting away with it because I am hurt, and because she feels guilty... which makes me feel guilty. I promise myself right then and there that I will forget Luka and concentrate on Abby and I. Our relationship is amazing, and I am not about to screw it up.

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	16. I hate boys

Short update

Abby's POV

The gym looks amazing, everyone did a really good job with the decorations. Carter and I are dressed as Fred and Wilma Flinstone, we look quite hilarious. I automatically pull Carter out on the dance floor with Susan and we are laughing and having tons of fun. I was a little worried that Carter and Luka would end up fighting again, but I don't see Luka anywhere.

Carter and I are slow dancing, and as I look around I spot Luka and Susan in the corner talking. He is dressed up like Prince Charming and she is dressed like Barbie so I can't help but laugh at how funny the look together. He seems really down and I almost feel bad for him.

"Hey, I'm going to go see what Susan is doing." I say to Carter as the song ends.

I walk over to Susan and Luka and he looks like crap, she seems to be comforting him.

"Hey guys... are you ok Luka?" I ask as he lifts his head slowly.

"Yea, look Susan I'm just going to go, i'll see you later."

"Luka, no come on you should be having fun right now." Susan says and I look at her wondering what is going on.

Luka looks at Susan and then at me.

"Alright, I'm gonna go talk to Carter. But no leaving!" she jokes and walks away. What the heck is going on?

"Is everything ok?"

"My grandma died yesterday. My dad wanted me to come and have fun, get my mind off things but I don't really want to be here."

"Luka, I'm really sorry. I didn't realize it was that bad."

"Yea, either did I. I haven't seen her in so long, I guess it hit me harder then I thought." he says and sits down. I sit next to him.

"Maybe you should go home, I doubt you want to be around our lovely class." I laugh trying to lighten the mood. He laughs and then leans in and hugs me suddenly.

"Thanks Abby, you always make me smile." he whispers. Just then I see Carter standing in the door, 'I'm pissed' written all over his face. Wow, the luck I have.

I lean away from Luka and he looks up to see John standing there.

"Carter-"

"What the hell is this? I told you not to touch her." he says walking towards Luka."

"John stop, you don't know what happened." I say trying to stop the inevitable.

"I don't care... you are really something you know that Kovac!" he says and shoves him. Luka shoves him back of course and they start fighting just like yesterday.

"You guys stop it!" I yell but the teachers pull them apart.

"Never thought I would see the jealous side of Carter." Luka says mockingly as he tries to break out of the teachers grasp.

"Let's go boys." the principle says as the walk out of the gym, everyone staring at them and then back to me.

Carter turns to look at me before walking out and I give him a nasty look. He is ridiculous, there was no reason for him to react like that and he said he would leave Luka alone.

"Are you ok?" Susan asks. I look up at her and sigh.

"I hate boys."

"Me too Ab. Me too."

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	17. Make up and Break up

Abby's POV

As Monday morning rolls around I have yet to talk to Carter. I am to angry with him, and Luka to talk to either of them even though they both keep calling me. I don't know why they can't just grow up, I am not some prize and they both know I hate fighting. Plus it makes me angry that Carter can't trust me, he has to go beating people up.

As I stand at my locker I see Carter walking towards me. I figured he would give it a go in person, but first thing in the morning? I don't want to deal with this.

"Abby, can we talk? I messed up I'm sorry, please don't be mad."

"Carter I don't want to talk to you about this in school."

"Well, I tried to call you all weekend-"

"and I didn't want to talk to you then. I don't want to talk to either of you." I say and close my locker walking away but he follows grabbing my arm.

"Ab, please. Just, let's talk about it. I didn't know his grandma died and I overreacted I know, but I can't help it."

"That is the lamest excuse I have ever heard." I say staring at him. "You know I hate fighting and this is so stupid. Do you not trust me to not fool around with Luka or something? I have made it clear that we are only friends!"

"Of course I trust you, I trust you more then anyone I know Abby! I was a stupid guy and I know that. I shouldn't have fought him but when I saw him touching you I just lost it."

"Carter we have only been together for about two months and things are already rediculous. Are you going to be like this every time I talk to some guy?"

"Abby you know this is different.. he kissed you! and he's your ex!"

"I know that, but just, you need to trust that nothing is going to happen. I'm not going to tip toe when it comes to Luka, so if you want us to stay together you need to get over this macho crap. You guys are idiots."

"I know, I'm really sorry." he says and takes my hand." I won't touch him, I promise.. don't be mad ok?"

"I'm still mad at BOTH of you. and I do understand where you are coming from John but this needs to stop."

"I know." I lean up and kiss him slowly and lightly but he deepens it and I lean back against the locker. It feels so good to be with him again, I hate when we fight, even when we weren't together. I pull away and I see Luka walk by looking at me, a pissed look written on his face. Susan told me that she talked to Carter Sunday and he told her all the things that Luka said to him. I couldn't believe how much he was pocking at Carter, like he was trying to piss him off intentionally. I decided I just can't deal with men.

---------------------------------

I walk up the stairs to Carter's room and he is nowhere to be found. He was suppose to come over after school but when he didn't show, and wasn't answering his cell, I got worried. I find him sitting on the steps of the deck outback. I walk over and sit next to him and I can tell something is up.

He grabs my hand and I kiss his neck softly letting him know I am here. He hands me an envelope and I open it slowly. Divorce papers.

"He has another mistress. Mom caught them, she filled for divorce." My heart sinks. Carter has always been saying that the best thing for his parents would be to divorce, but I knew he didn't want that. Eleanor has filled for divorce before and so had Jack, but Carter never took it seriously so this must be bad. All he has ever wanted for them to be happy together, all of them.

"I'm sorry." I say, not knowing what to say to make him feel better.

"Yea well it's for the better. They hate each other, you know that."

"Yea but still. As much as you say you want this I know you don't." I say and squeeze his hand. He doesn't say much, never does when he's upset, and I decide talking about the whole Luka thing can wait.

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	18. College Blues

Carter's POV

It has been three weeks since I found the divorce papers in my dad's office and my parents have been fighting like crazy. My mother took the papers back but my father told her he would file himself, stating it was just time to end it. My mother of course won't sign the papers, I think she is afraid of losing all of the money.. it has nothing to do with my dad. She is something.

Abby and I have been getting along great, putting this whole Luka thing behind us. Sitting here in the auditorium biting my nails and being bored I see Abby walk in.

"Hi." she says and kisses me.

"Hey, thought you were going to skip and leave me all alone." I joke. We have to sit here and watch a presentation on choosing colleges. I already know I want to go to northwestern so I don't want to be here.

"I was thinking about it. I'm getting kind of sick of hearing these.. I mean it's the same stuff over and over." she says annoyed as the man starts talking. He hands around papers and little surveys and watching Abby fill out her paper I am surprised to see that she wants to go to college on the east coast.

"Since when are you thinking about the east coast?"

"For awhile, I don't know where for sure but as far away from Maggie as I can." she laughs and goes back to writing.

"Weren't you looking at Northwestern?"

"I was, but I don't want to go so close. I am ready to see new things. Besides I doubt I would get in."

"Abby, you have a 3.7 GPA..." I say and she looks up at me. I never thought about us going so far apart. It kind of scares me.

"Well, I just don't want to go to Northwestern." she says seeming annoyed. I guess I am pushing a bit. We go back to our papers and as we leave the presentation I look at Abby thinking about what next year might be like. I have never been away from Abby more then a week when I went on vacation with my family. It would be really weird not seeing her everyday.

"So where are you looking at?"

"Well I really like Georgetown, and Dartmouth but that is pretty far." Yea it is. D.C I can handle... but New Hampshire? Abby is top in the class, I know she can get in, and I want her to go to a great school... but I don't want to lose my best friend and the girl I am quickly falling in love with.

"Are you ok?" she asks.

"I guess. I just never thought you would go so far away... we'll never see each other." I say feeling down, she lifts my chin and I can tell it is hitting her also.

"I know it's far, but we'll be ok, and besides we haven't even applied anywhere yet, lets not think about it." she says trying to avoid it... she always does this. I let is go not wanting to talk about it either and we go to class.

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We go to Abby's place after school and study. I can't seem to get my mind off of this college thing, it's really getting to me but Abby just doesn't want to talk about it. Sitting next to her, I keep staring wondering what it will be like not seeing her all the time. What if we stop talking?

"Carter, hello?"

"Huh?

"You're staring... are you ok?"

"yea, sorry... just thinking." I kiss her deeply and before you know it we are getting pretty heavy. This has happened a few times but we stop before things get to far. We have only been together for three months but it seems like so much longer, I mean we are already so close. I begin sliding my hand up her shirt as she runs her hands through my hair.. being with her is amazing, and although I know we shouldn't go all the way so soon.. sometimes it's extremely hard to hold back.

"John, John we should stop." Abby says out of breath. I pull back and look at her and I know she is right. We are going to fast. I think all this talk of college is helping. All I want to so is be with her, it's like I am going to lose her tomorrow or something. Between my parents and college and the whole thing with Luka, this year isn't turning out to be what I thought it would.

"Hey look at me." she says and I look down still laying on top of her. "Is everything ok? I mean I want this too.. but it's only been three months Carter I just-"

"What? No, no it's not that. hey, I would never push you.. and I know we haven't been together that long but it feels so much different... it feels like we have been together for so long." I say and caress her cheek. It really does, Susan always calls us married, as has since we were 10.

She kisses me long and deep and I climb off of her and lay next to her, facing each other. I talk to her about my worries of next year and she tells me she will consider looking closer, but after I feel guilty for making her reconsider. I agree to look at other school also and we both decide to see where we get accepted and go from there. I won't push Abby away from her dream schools and I don't want to leave mine... I hope it all works out.

please review!


	19. Dangerous roads ahead

Abby's POV

Walking out of school Friday I am totally psyched for this weekend. Carter, Susan, Mark, and I are going to spend the weekend up at Carter's family condo in the mountains. It has been snowing all week and I can't wait to get out my snowboard.

I walk over to my car, and just my luck it isn't starting. I see Luka walking to his car and as much as I don't want to, I ask him for a ride.

"So how have you been?" he asks making small talk on what seems to be the longest car ride ever.

"Pretty good, busy. This college crap is kicking my butt."

"ha, yea. I'm all done with that."

"It's snowing like crazy... the roads look like they are getting pretty bad." I say looking out the window. I can barely see the houses and things as we drive by.

"Yea, it's a little slick." he says. I hope we can still make it to the mountain tonight. We might have to leave tomorrow.

"Wo." I hear Luka say as he jerks the wheel. I freeze up a little, automatic reaction, but he gets the car under control.

"Sorry about that, it's really getting icy."

"It's fine." I say worrying a bit. He should probably slow down if it is that bad.

We turn on to my road and start making our way to my house. As we are going around a corner I see Luka grab the wheel and I can feel us sliding. I don't even have a chance to scream before we slam into an incoming car.

----------------------------------------------

Sitting here staring at the clock I'm starting to get worried. Where is Abby? We are suppose to be leaving to meet Susan and Mark at 4 and it's already 5. I called her house but no one answered so I decide to just drive other there.

As I walk out the door my phone rings so I run back inside to answer it. It's Luka. Why the hell is he calling me?

"So what's up?" I ask slowly.

"Well, don't freak but there is something you need to know."

"What happened?" I say knowing he means Abby. Every time someone says don't freak before hand... they mean Abby. They should learn by now that if they say don't freak... I'm going to.

"I gave her a ride home today and the roads were really bad... we got into an accident."

"What! Where is she? Is she ok?"

"Carter slow dow-"

"No, Luka is she ok?"

"I don't know. We're at the hospital... you should get here." I hang up before he can say another word and drive to the hospital. He's right the roads suck, by why the hell was he giving her a ride? He should have been more careful.

I run into the doors of the ER and they point me down the hall. I walk to the door of her room and peak inside. My jaw drops and my heart stops when I see her lying there. She has tubes coming out everywhere and there is blood all over the place.

"Are you family?"

"No, boyfriend. Is she ok?"

"She had massive internal bleeding and a pretty serious head injury. We managed to control bleeding for now but she is going to need surgery, we are just waiting for the surgeon to come down.

"Can I go in?" I ask not knowing what to do. Surgery? I didn't know it was this serious, I am going to kill Luka.

I walk inside and sit down next to her. Her face is very pale, and there is machines beeping everywhere. If she needs surgery why the hell is she down here? I caress her cheek and kiss her forehead.

"I'm here baby, you're going to make it. You're the strongest person I know, you can do this." I whisper to her as the doctor, I presume surgeon walks in.

He pulls down the blanket and looks and peels off a bandage. He writes something down and then wheels Abby out.

"How long is the surgery going to be?" I ask following him.

"Are you family?" he asks. God, what is it with family?

"No, boyfriend. But she has no family here."

"Well it will be a couple of hours. You can sit upstairs in the waiting room." he says and wheels her off. I stand there watching as the elevator doors shut not knowing what to do. I can't believe this is happening.

I turn around to see Maggie running towards me. I explain everything to her and we walk upstairs to the waiting room. I sit tapping my fingers and I can tell I am annoying everyone there. I can't help it I don't know what to do with myself. I am so nervous, what if she doesn't pull through? I can't lose her.

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	20. Old faces, Old feelings

CARTER'S POV

Abby made it out of surgery but she hasn't woken up yet. They said they are waiting on the swelling in her brain to go down before they can tell anything. Luka walked away with a broken arm and some scratches...asshole. The person he hit said he had to have been going 50 mph. What the hell was he thinking? It should be him in there.

Mark and Susan stoped by to see Abby and we are all sitting in her room when Luka knocks on the door.

"What the hell are you doing here!" I say getting up. Mark stops me putting his hands on my shoulders. This isn't the time.

"I wanted to see if she was ok. I didn't mean for this to happen."

"Really? Why were you going so fast Luka? Were you trying to show off, cause you might want to look at the consequences... look at her!"

"Carter I wasn't trying to hurt her, I would never do that... the roads were bad, there was nothing I could do."

"You could have slowed down." I say and walk back over to Abby before I break his other arm.

"Maybe you should go Luka." I hear Susan say surprising me. I know that her and Luka are still friends, but I guess she is pissed at him also. He turns around and walks out head down. I'm being a total jerk and I know it, but until Abby wakes up I don't think I will be able to play nice with that kid.

----------------------------------------------------

After two days Abby still hasn't woken up, and I'm starting to panic. The longer she sleeps the worse chance there is of her waking up. Maggie made me go home for the night, I had been at the hospital all day and the night before. Walking into her room the next morning, I see tons of flowers everywhere from people at school. Everyone loves Abby.

I walk over and sit next to her holding her hand. She looks a little bit better, not so pale and weak. If only she would wake up.

"Hey man." I hear someone say and I look up to see Eric standing in the doorway.

"Eric! Hey bro." I say getting up and hugging him. I didn't know he was home.

"How is she doing? Mom said it was bad."

"Yea, well you know Abby. She's strong." I say looking back at her.

"Yea she is. How are you doing?"

"Uh, ask me later."

"I heard you guys were together now?..." he asks and I nod. "Well I am glad you finally got your head out of your butt, I knew you guys would finally get your acts together some day." he says laughing and I laugh a little. Good ol' Eric. It has to be hard for him to see Abby here too, they are really close.

"Are you going to stay home for awhile?"

"yea, we're on winter break anyways... so I have a few weeks off."

I sit down again and grab Abby's hand kissing it. I pull her covers up a little and I notice Eric watching me.

"Have you told her yet?" he asks.

"Told her what?"

"That you're in love with her!" he yells as if to say duh.

"No.. I mean I don't know if I am... how do you know when you are?"

"Carter you have been in love with my sister since you were 5... I think you know."

"We haven't been together that long, I wouldn't want to freak her out."

"Trust me. Tell her... I know she feels the same."

I leave to grab some lunch and give Eric sometime with Abby. I keep thinking about what he said... does she feel the same? I have been debating about how I feel for awhile, I mean if you have never been in love before how do you know what it is? But, Eric is right. I do love her... and I have since we were kids.

I walk back up to her floor and see nurses running into her room. I panic when I hear the beeping.

"What happened?" I say to Eric as I reach her room.

"I don't know everything just went off!" he says obviously freaked out. I run over to her side and push my way through the nurses and doctors.

"Abby, come on. Abby don't leave me please. Just open your eyes!" I say as the nurses pull me away.

"You need to move sir!" I stand leaning against the wall in the back. Machines are beeping and there are people coming in and out of the room. I see them wheel in a defibrillator and I feel like I am going to throw up.

Eric comes over and pulls me out of the room, sitting me just outside. As soon as I sit down I stand back up and run over to the garbage can... and puke. I look up to see the doctor walking out of her room and I walk over to him. He looks up at me, his expression unclear.. but, then he nods and smiles.

They saved her.

Please review


	21. Gossip and blame

Carter's POV

It has been three days and Abby hasn't woken up. Thank god they were able to save her, I was so worried that that was it.

I have been sitting here ever since the scare and I don't plan on moving. Maggie keeps trying to get me to go home, I have already missed enough school but I don't want to leave.

"John?" I hear my mother's voice and look up.

"What are you doing here?"

"Well I just came by to show my respects-"

"This isn't a funeral mother."

"John please. Maggie called me, she is worried. You haven't been eating?... Besides you have been missing to much school."

"I'm not leaving. I don't care about school."

"Well you aren't going to sit here and starve yourself. You aren't sleeping either.. Abby wouldn't want you to act his way. Now I want you to come at least for the day. I don't mind if you stay here, I don't think there is any debating there... but you need to go to school John. Sitting here isn't helping." I know she is right, if Abby were awake she would tell me to eat, to sleep, all that. But I just can't seem to.. like I am afraid if I leave something will happen.

"John your mother is right, you need to come home son." I hear my dad say.. walking in the door. The two of them in the same room, and agreeing? Well that's something new.

I kiss Abby's forehead and grab my coat. I walk past my parents, annoyed with them for no reason in particular.

"I'm going to go say goodbye to Eric." I say and I hear them follow.

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School was hell the next day. Not only was it Friday, the slowest day ever, but everyone kept asking me about Abby. I just wanted to be left alone.

"How are you holding up?" Susan asks walking over to me.

"I wish people would stop asking me about her. I don't feel like explaining it."

"Screw them, they are just looking for gossip... but really, how are you?"

"I don't know. I don't know what to do with myself, I feel so lost. I mean when she moved we lost touch, but I never forgot her... and we still talked every once in awhile. Besides last year I have never been apart from Abby, and I know she is still here but not being able to talk to her is killing me."

"I know, I feel the same way. But she'll get through this... I remember the first couple of weeks after she left. We were wrecks." she jokes.

"I know, I remember us planning to skip town and head out to minnesota." I say laughing and she laughs too. I don't know if Susan would of, but I would have gone through with it... if my mom hadn't found my map. I laugh to myself just thinking about how crazy I was.

"Carter?" I turn around to see Luka standing there.

"What?"I say stand offish.

"How is she?"

"She's doing better. But she hasn't woken up... they don't know if she will."

"I'm really sorry. I didn't mean for this to happen."

"Yea." I say and nod. I don't know what to say.

"I heard that the lady we hit-"

"YOU hit."

"Ya.. I heard she was fine."

"Funny how that works. Everyone was fine but Abby... the innocent in it all." I say and slam my locker before walking away. I'm to frustrated to talk to him. Everything is not fine, and I'm not going to act like it isn't his fault.

"CARTER!" I hear Susan yell but I don't stop I keep walking down the hall and right out the door to my car. I don't care if there is another class left, I can't be here anymore.

Please review!


	22. awake

A few days later...

Abby's POV

Waking up, I groggily look around. Where the hell am I? I can see flowers everywhere, cards on the window cill, and balloons in the corner. I lift my hand weakly and I see the IV stuck in my hand. The hospital?

I turn my head and see the heart monitor and the IV stand. There is a big bandage around my head and my chest hurts a lot. I try to speak and my voice is very hoarse. What happened?

"Oh my god! Abby!" I hear and turn to see my mother running towards me.

"Mom? What.. why am I in the hospital?" I say slowly. I have never felt so tired before.

"Abby, you were in a car accident. You have been in a coma for almost two weeks." she says tears in her eyes... a car accident? Oh no, Luka.

"Mom, Luka.. is her?"

"He is fine honey, just a broken arm." I breath out in relief and remember what happened. He was driving pretty fast, but I was almost home. Then we hit another car.

"I need to go get the doctor." she says and kisses my forehead before leaving.

"It is about time you woke up." I hear and I smile. Eric, I don't have to turn my head to know it's him. He comes over and hugs me gently.

"What are you doing here?"

"Mom called me and I flew home. I'm on break anyway... how are you feeling?"

"Kind of out of it. I have been sleeping for almost two weeks and I feel like I haven't slept in years." I laugh.

The doctor comes in and gives me a look over. He tells me it's normal to feel tired, and that I should be just fine now, they were just waiting for me to come out of my coma.

After sitting around talking and catching up with Eric and my mom I can't wait any longer. I want to see Carter.

"Mom... has Carter been here?"

"Oh geez, that boy practically lived here for a week... his parents and I finally convinced him to go home and sleep." I smile thinking of him sitting here, he is always there for me.

"Could you call him? I really want to see him."

"Yea, I'll call him." she says and walks over to the phone.

"Glad you two finally got it together, I was gonna have to knock some sense into you guys." Eric says jokingly. He has been picking on us for years over the will they won't they crap.

"Shut up." I say hitting him, quite weakly. He pretends to be hurt and I laugh.

"His mother said he is already on his way over." My mom says walking back over.

"We were thinking about building him his own room where the bathroom is." Eric says sarcastically. Man I have missed him.

We sit and talk for awhile longer when I start to get tired. I keep my eyes open though, I want to be awake when Carter gets here. He is going to flip I think to myself.

"Look who I found in the hall." I hear Eric say and I turn to see Carter there. The look on his face is priceless as I turn my head, him seeing that I am awake.

"Oh my god you're awake!" he says walking towards me, a huge grin on his face. He hugs me and kisses my neck. I grab his hand and he sits down on my bed. My mom drags Eric out of the room so we can be alone for a minute, a big grin on her face matching Carter's.

"I can't believe you're awake, I was so scared Ab." he says squeezing my hand.

"I'm sorry... I heard you overstayed your welcome." I say picking on him.

"Well, ya, I didn't want to leave." he says laughing and then getting serious.

"Hey, I'm ok. Don't be sad." I say trying to cheer him up. He must have been a wreck, I know I would have been. He puts his hand on my cheek and rubs it with his thumb. I close my eyes and begin to fall asleep.

He kisses my forehead and begins to stand up but I grab his hand.

"Lay with me." I whisper and he lays down next to me barely fitting on these beds. I try to scoot over but I am to weak. He doesn't care though he curls up as close as he can to me and we fall asleep.

Please Review.


	23. Carter vs Carter

Carter's POV

As I wheel Abby out of the hospital, a big weight is lifted. The doctor said she would recover fine, her memory is a little bad however. She doesn't remember the accident very much, but I guess that's a good thing.

It has been two weeks since she woke up, and she is so excited to get out of the hospital. She still has a big scar on her stomach from surgery, but otherwise she looks really good.

"Abby! You look so good!" Susan yells as she walks into Abby's room. Abby and I are sitting on her bed and Susan comes over charging for a hug. Abby laughs as she falls back on the bed.

"So what's new, I feel like I have been gone forever." Abby asks excited to catch up on everything. I leave and go hang out with Eric so they can talk.

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It's the weekend before christmas and my parents are throwing their annual ball. Another night of pretending to be a perfect family. What fun. They don't even talk to each other anymore and here they stand arm in arm greeting everyone.

Abby is supposed to be here any minute and I have to admit I am a little nervous. She hasn't really done anything since the accident, I hope she is well enough to be coming. I tried to convince her not to, but she knows I hate being here with all these people alone. The only way my parents ever get me to go is if Abby comes.

I see her walk into the ballroom at the museum and she looks amazing. Her hair is up and curled and her dress is a long silk dark blue that crisscrosses in the back.

"You look amazing." I tell her and she smiles blushing. You would never know what she went through the last couple of weeks if it wasn't for the cut on the very top of her forehead from the surgery.

"Not looking so bad yourself Mr. Carter." she laughs. It is so good to have everything back to normal.

We dance and talk the whole night and I have to admit that I actually am having a good time. I decide to drive Abby home considering it's almost 12am and I don't want to push it.

"Mom, I'm going to drive Abby home."

"Oh, John you can't just leave. There are people here to see you."

"I have been here for 5 hours... they obviously didn't want to see me that bad." I say rudely. There aren't people here to see me, it would just look bad if I left.

"John, don't use that tone with me. You are staying. Have the driver bring her home or she can stay the night."

"Mom, she has medicine she has to take, she needs to rest. I am taking her home."

"John Carter-"

"No, Mrs. Carter it's fine.. John I can call my mom or something." Abby says trying to avoid a confrontation.

"No, I can bring you home." I say sternly making my point. I know she is trying to help, but my mother is being ridiculous.

"What is all the shouting about?" My father asks approaching us.

"I'm leaving to bring Abby home."

"Alright don't be long."

"Um, Jack I think he should stay. There are people here that traveled to see him and he is just running out."

"Eleanor please, It's not a big deal." he says smiling at everyone as they look on.

"Oh really and how does it look that our son is running out on a family party with her." Emphasizing the her, like Abby is some piece of dirt. My mother never expressed her dislike for Abby when we were friends but the thought of us dating bothers her I think, my dad adores her though. Even though she doesn't love her she has never said such things in front of her.

"Excuse me!" I yell at her.

"Alright enough you two." My father says quietly but strongly. Everyone is beginning to look at us, watching our screaming match. I can tell my mother is mortified, which I love.

"John please I can call someone and get a ride." Abby says hurt and wanting to bail.

"Come on." I say and walk away leading her to the car.

The ride to Abby's is pretty quiet. I don't know what to say, I know she is a little hurt about my mother's comment. We pull up to her house and I park the car.

"Well, I guess I will see you tomorrow?" she says opening the door.

"Ab, wait. I'm sorry about that.. my mom is a bitch, you know that." I say pulling her hand from the door.

"I knew your mother didn't like me. I have known that since I was 5 I mean I'm not dumb. But I have never heard her say it I guess."

"Don't let her get to you. She just expects me to date some dumb ditz with a checking account. You're so much better then that and you know it."

"Yea... well I'll talk to you later."

"Hey, are we ok?"

"Sure. Bye." she says and kisses me getting out of the car. Somehow I don't believe her.

Please Review!


	24. I love you too

ABBY's POV

It's New Year's Eve and Susan and I are getting ready at her house for the party she is throwing. Her parents are out of town so she is going to have a blowout at her house. I'm definitely ready for some fun, I am so sick of being babied over the accident. I am fine now, my stitches are out and I am off my meds.

Carter and I haven't seen much of each other the past couple of days. After the Party at his house I have been to uncomfortable to go over there, and I have been kind of avoiding him.

After about an hour everyone begins showing up and things are out of control. I think there are 50 more people here then we thought and everyone is crowding around the beer. This should be fun. I see Carter walk in and I walk over to say hi, I can't ignore him... and he hasn't done anything wrong.

"Hey."

"Hey, wasn't sure if you were going to be here."

"Yea, I think I need to party a little." I joke.

"Is everything ok with us? I have been trying to call you.."

"I don't want to talk about it now, let's just forget it."

"Ab-" he begins but I kiss him hard and he stops.

After about a hour of spin the bottle I am so drunk that the room is spinning. I didn't mean to go overboard but I just wanted to forget all the crap that has been going on, not to mention Carter keeps wanting to talk.

As midnight strikes we are all dancing and having fun. It was really a great party, the only thing broken was the bathroom door... which is a long story.

As people begin to head home I curl up on the couch with Carter and start to fall asleep. He pulls me tight and we both konk out in minutes.

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I wake up to the sun shining way to bright in Susan's living room and look around at the complete mess this house is. After puking my guts out I begin picking up the bottles and cups lying around.

"ehhh, that is way to bright." I hear Carter moan as he rubs his eyes, and I smile.

"Rise and shine sleeping beauty."

"I think I am still drunk."

"I think so too." I joke and he throws a plastic cup at me. I duck and laugh.

"Hey, you were way worse then I was last night." he yells back as he goes into the bathroom. I probably was, but I can hold it better then he can... guess I can thank maggie for that.

After cleaning up we say goodbye to Susan and walk home, neither of us drove. It is freezing outside and I cling to Carter most of the way. We go get hot chocolate and sit by the river trying to sober up before heading home.

"Ab, will you please tell me what's wrong." he asks out of the blue. I was hoping he forgot about all that.

"Carter, it's nothing."

"Well it's something. You practically avoided me for a week." he says raising his voice and I can tell he is worried. So am I, I pause for a minute and then answer.

"Do you think we made a mistake?"

"What?"

"Getting together." I say and his face drops." Maybe your mother is right... maybe I'm not good enough for you."

"What! Abby no, I already told you to forget what she said."

"Well I can't just forget it Carter. There is truth to it and I just-" I began rambling, nervous and scared that his mother is right but he grabs my face and pulls me into a long kiss.

"I love you." he says as I look up at him. Wow, I wasn't expecting that. I look at him shocked and i can't seem to respond. He looks at me for a minute and then kisses me again slowly.

"It's almost noon, I should get home. Do you want me to walk you?" he asks standing up like nothing happened.

"Uh, uh sure." I say and stand up. He grabs my hand and we walk to my house in silence.

We reach my house and he kisses me before walking away mumbling something about calling him later. I open the door but then pull it back again. Wake up Abby.

"Carter!" I yell and he turns around.

"I love you too!" I say and he smiles which makes me smile uncontrollably. I turn and go into the house his words running through my brain over and over.

PLEASE REVIEW


	25. Temptation

Abby's POV

"Duck!" I hear Susan yell as she throws a snowball over me towards Carter. Smokes him right in the face and I start laughing hysterically.

We finally came up to the mountain, like we were suppose to before the accident. We are hanging outside the condo after a long day of snowboarding and I am so tired.

Carter walks over to me and pulls me up as I try to stay sitting.

"Come on she is killing me babe!" he yells and drags me over to his 'fort'. He is such a three year old, but hey, so is Susan.

After Susan kicked out butts we headed back to our rooms for the night, it was only 9pm but all of us were fading. Carter and I are sharing a room, and I have to admit I am a bit nervous. Things between us have been so great lately, but not having an parents around? I know there is going to be temptation.

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I look at the clock.. 12:45, I just can't seem to fall asleep. I was so tired until I actually went to bed. Now I can't shut my mind off.

I feel Carter snuggle into me and kiss my neck, I guess he can tell I am awake.

"Stop thinking."

"I can't help it." I laugh and turn to face him.

"What are you thinking about?"

"Everything." I whisper and he smiles slightly. He leans in and kisses me softly but things get more heavy. He rolls on top of me and begins kissing my neck and chest. I know we should stop, I know what is going to happen, at the same time I want it. I wouldn't want to lose my virginity to anyone else, and we love each other... so why should we wait? If we both want it, why not just be together?

Things get a little out of control and before I know it Carter is lying there in his boxers, I in my underwear. I hear the floor creak and I panic, now I know why this can't happen, Susan and Mark are right next door.

"Carter... Carter." I say pushing him back a little.

"What's wrong?"

"Susan and Mark are right across the hall, we can't do this."

"Abby they are sleeping." he says ignoring me and kissing my neck again.

"Stop it!" I yell and push him off getting up and putting on my shirt and pants.

"Where are you going?"

"Downstairs, do you not understand what stop means!"

"Hey, Abby." he says getting up and walking over to me, putting his hands on my face.

"I'm sorry, I'm not trying to push." he says apoligetically and I sigh. I just flipped out for no reason, and I know it. I just panicked, I guess I am a bit scared.

"No, I'm sorry I guess I am just freaking out a little, I know-"

"I love you." he says and caresses my cheek.

"I love you too... I'm sorry." I whisper as he pulls me into a hug.

He pulls me back over to the bed and we lay there for awhile just talking before falling asleep. As I drift off I can't help but think of Valentine's day next week. Things between Carter and I are either amazing or horrible lately. I want to do something special for V-day, I just don't know what.

Please review... the chapters have been kind of short but I have a whole storyline in mind, I am just trying to fill in some chapters to get there!


	26. How romeo of you

Abby's POV

It's Valentines day, and I am getting ready for my date with Carter. We are going out to eat and then heading to his house to watch a movie, nothing big. I wanted to do something special but there isn't much to do. When he picks me up, he tells me that he wants to cook me dinner instead and I laugh thinking about his cooking skills. I agree though, how can you turn down something so romantic?

When we get to his house he cooks me dinner and it's so cute how he has this whole elaborate table set up. I laugh when we exchange gifts because we did the same thing. We both gave each other our class rings. I know guys don't really wear their girlfriends rings, but I thought he could put it on a chain or something, and he does, wearing it proud which makes me smile.

We are all snuggled up on the couch getting ready to watch a movie when my cell rings- Susan.

"Hello?"

"Ab.. Abby?" I hear her stutter through tears.

"Susan what's wrong? Are you ok?"

"Yea, Mark broke up with me."

"What! On Valentines day!"

"I Know! Look, I don't mean to bother you and Carter but I just really need someone to talk-"

"It's ok. Um.. I'll be over in a second." I say and hang up. I don't want to leave, but I know Susan needs me. She really liked Mark, what a dick.

I explain what happened to Carter and he protests but tells me to go. I feel so bad about ruining out night, maybe I will be able to make it back later.

-------------------------------

Laying in bed I keep thinking of tonight's events. I went over to Susan's and ended up being there until 11pm. She was pretty upset, which is not Susan so I knew that she really liked Mark. I didn't make it back to Carter's, I felt really bad but he assured me it was ok.

I am about to nod off when I hear a tapping noise. What the hell? I look over at my window and see a pebble hit it. Climbing out of bed I walk over to the window and see Carter standing outside.

"This is awfully romeo of you Mr. Carter." I laugh and he gets embarrassed.

"Is you mom home?"

"No she is still out on her date." I say dragging the word date in a oooo voice. I think it's kind of funny that my 43 year old mother is out on a date.

"Can I come up for awhile?" I nod and laugh, walking down to the door to let him in.

We go to my room and lay on my bed talking about Susan and everything that happened. My mom calls, letting me know that she is staying at "Nicks" house.

"I guess it went well then." Carter jokes wagging his eyebrows.

"Ew, I don't want to think about that!" I yell and throw a pillow at him. He tackles me back on the bed and I freeze holding up my hands in surrender. We laugh and then pause staring at each other. He leans down and kisses me deeply starting a serious makeout session.

I pull his shirt up and he breaks the kiss looking at me questioningly.

"Are you sure." he asks and I nod my head. We continue exploring and undressing, it feels incredible being with him. We never let things get this far.

"Ab, are you sure... I don't want to push things." he asks again pulling back.

"Would you shut up and kiss me!" I say laughing and he laughs before kissing me again, falling over me.

-----------------------------------------

I wake up to the sun shining through my window. I can feel Carter's arm around me and I smile automatically. Last night was amazing. I'm not going to lie, it hurt a little at first but I have never felt so loved before, and I know only John could make me feel that way. I roll over and see him sleeping his head that was buried in my hair is now hanging off the pillow. I laugh slightly and then make my way out of bed quietly and into the bathroom.

I stand there looking at myself in the mirror and I can't wipe the grin off my face. Everything seems so perfect right now, which is quite new to me. I never want this feeling to go away.

Ok, I didn't know how detailed I was allowed to write here, so I left it pretty PG... I'm sure everyone can fill in the blanks. Please REVIEW!


	27. Beautiful Disaster

Alright, just so everyone knows before reading this. yes. I know this has been done many times, but don't worry... this is going to be different.

Abby's POV

"Oh my god! Finally!" Susan screams as we sit in her living room. She is more excited then I was.

"Shhhh!" I say nodding towards her parents in the kitchen. Maybe this isn't the best place to talk about this.

"Ok, sorry. But seriously! How could you wait so long to tell me!"

"Susan, it has been two days."

"Yea two days to long, you have to tell me everything! I want details.. well maybe not to detailed." She says laughing and I throw a pillow at her.

I tell her as much as I think she needs to hear, I mean it is kind of private, and she keeps picking on my red face. I can't help it, I mean this is a little weird considering we are all so close. It's like her telling me about her and my brother or something, why does she want to hear this?

---------------------------------------------

Over the next couple of weeks everything is so great. Carter and I are so happy and everything just seems to be going well. However, as I walk into school this morning, I can't help but hate life. I feel like crap, and I am sure I look it.

"Hey you ok babe? You look really pale?" Carter asks coming up and putting his arm around me.

"I feel a little sick, no big." I say and he looks at me concerned. I smile and kiss him walking into the classroom and he follows.

By fourth period I am freaking out. I have a million things running through my head when I realize that I haven't gotten my period. I grab Susan and pull her into the bathroom explaining everything.

"Abby, you guys use protection right?"

"Yes, and I'm on birth control!"

"Well, then chill out. You are probably just late... look we will get a test after school if you are that worried, but don't let it get you this stressed, the chances are slim to none."

"Well, that would be my luck wouldn't it." I say bitterly freaking out.

"Ab, come one think positive for once in your life. I'm sure it's just a cold."

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We go and buy a test after school and I sit in the bathroom waiting. This is the longest three minutes of my life.

"Three." Susan says looking at her watch.

"I can't do it, you do it." she looks at me with a yea right look but then picks up the stick anyways.

"Ab-"

"What does it say!"

"Umm.. it's positive." she says looking down.

I instantly start crying. I was so careful, and I waited so long, I really think someone hates me.

"I can't do this Susan! I'm 18, I'm going to college next year!"

"I know, ok don't freak. You... you don't have to have it." I look at her and start crying harder. What the hell am I going to do, what am I suppose to tell Carter?

"What am I going to tell Carter?"

"I don't know Ab, I really don't know." she says and pulls me into a hug. We sit there on the bathroom floor, me sobbing, Susan comforting me the best she can.

Thanks for all the reviews everyone! Keep it up, I love reading them!


	28. Harry and Sally

Abby's POV

I knock on Carter's door and I know I am going to puke. I don't know what to say to him, I mean this is not exactly what every 18 year old boy wants to hear. The maid lets me inside and I see Carter running downstairs to greet me.

"Hey, I thought we weren't suppose to meet for another hour?" he says walking up and kissing me.

"Actually, I need to talk to you."

"Uh oh, what's wrong?" I look at him and then the maid and he gets the point pulling me outback onto the deck.

"So what's going on?"

"Well, do you feel like things are going a little fast?"

"With us? no... do you? I thought things were great."

"I just think that we are going to fast, I mean we are only 18 we don't know what love is-" I say trying to laugh it off but he isn't laughing.

"What! Abby you sound like my parents, I love you... and I know it."

"Well, I think we should take some time apart." I say slowly looking everywhere but in his eyes. I know I am hurting him, it's killing me because I love him more then anything but I know we just can't stay together. We are moving way to fast... and look at the results.

"Where is this coming from?" he says reaching out to me but I step back. He looks surprised and hurt and I turn around to leave.

"Ab, wow wait. You can't just leave after saying that."

"Carter please don't."

"No, I know you don't want this... so what's going on? Everything has been going great-"

"No it hasn't! It just hasn't. I don't want to be together." I say trying to pull away from him so he doesn't see me cry.

"Ab, come on talk to me."

"I want to see other people." I say quickly and sternly. I want him to believe this, and as much as I would rather die then hurt him, this is the only way. He just stares at me and I can tell he is hurt. He actually looks really pissed.

"I'll... I'll talk to you later." I say walking as quickly as I can to the door, leaving him bewildered.

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"He won't even look at me." I tell Susan sitting in class. Carter is sitting across from us and has yet to glance this way.

"Well, can you blame him Abby?"

"I know, but-"

"Are you sure about this? I mean I know how much you guys care about each other, he would want to know about the baby."

"Shh! I know he would, but I can't do that to him. Besides I don't know if I am even going to keep it. Either way we just can't be together anymore, we were getting way to serious and look what happened!"

"So, look Abby I love you to death and I'll support you all the way but I think you are making a mistake. If you told Carter how you felt, I mean he would understand."

"Can we just not talk about this anymore?" I say with a down face and she smiles.

"Fine, but I'm not letting this go. I mean after all you are my Harry and Sally." she jokes. She always calls us that. I laugh a little and then feel like crying realizing we really aren't together anymore.

Please Review


	29. Blackout

Abby's POV

It has been a week since I broke things off with Carter and I have never felt so alone. I wish that he would talk to me but I can tell he is to hurt and angry. I want to be together, I do, but I have to face that it just isn't going to work. I don't know what I am suppose to do about this baby, he deserves to know, but I know him and I know he will try to stay with me and support me. I can't let him give up everything for me.

I walk into the house after school and I can see beer bottles all over the place. Damn it. This is the last thing I want to deal with right now. I guess she was due though, it has been at least 6 months since she stopped her meds.

"Maggie!...MOM!" I yell but I hear nothing. I walk upstairs and go to open her door but it's locked.

"Mom, it's Abby. Mom, why don't you open the door and let me on in." I say hopefully cunning her. I have to act like she is five when she is like this. Hopefully she isn't manic, depressed I can deal with... manic is another story.

"Mom, come on. Have you been skipping your meds? Please open up I have something for you." She doesn't answer and I start to get worried. I go in my room and find the key to her door that I have hidden. I walk into her room and I see her curled up in the corner. I walk over and check her pulse which is weak, she has blood all over her shirt.

"Mom! Mom, what happened! Wake up!" I yell but she doesn't respond. Great. I pull up her sleeves and I can see that she cut herself. I walk into the bathroom and grab a towel to stop the bleeding.

"Abby?" She says coming to.

"Yea mom, it's me. You need to go to the hospital, there pretty deep this time." I say putting some bandages on her wounds.

"No no no I don't. I don't want to."

"Yes you do." I say and pull her up she starts resisting but is too weak. I pull her into the hallway and she pushes me away.

"Where were you today!" she yells, oh joy.. the manic stage.

"I had school mom, you know that. Now, come on we have to fix you up."

"Don't you use that tone with me!"

"Sorry... come on." I say avoiding a fight.

"Abby, please don't bring me there please!" she yells starting to cry. I can't deal with the fits, she is to strong for me to handle.

"Mom, don't worry we are just going for a little ride."

"No, no we aren't you're lying! They are going to lock me up!" She yells and starting kicking and struggling.

"Maggie stop it! We aren't going to the hospital ok?" I say losing my patience. She starts ripping her bandages off and I fight to keep them on.

"Abby please!" She yells and starts pushing me away.

"Maggie come on-" I start but she pushes me back and I trip and fall backwards, falling down the stairs. I look up and I see Maggie coming towards me yelling before I black out in pain.

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Please Review!


	30. Aftermath

Abby's POV

Waking up I look around at the familiar scenery. Back in the hospital, how lovely. I close my eyes wincing in pain and then suddenly I panic. Where is maggie? They must have taken her to the psych ward. I didn't want them knowing what happened, I didn't want her locked up.

"Abby?" I look over to the door and see Susan standing there with flowers. She looks hesitant to come in so i nod and wave her over.

"Are you ok?"

"I don't know, I just woke up. What happened?" I know what happened, but I don't know what everyone else knows. Plus I have no idea what the doctors said. I feel fine except for my head hurts, and my stomach a little-... then it dawns on me, the baby.

"I don't know I haven't seen the doctors. Your mom called me and told me what happened."

"My mom? Where is she?"

"I don't know, she was with the doctor when I got here. You haven't been here that long, maybe a couple hours." I turn my head and a tear rolls down my cheek.

"Ab, do you think?" she asks nodding towards my hand on my stomach, she can't seem to continue. I shrug my shoulders and start crying. She hugs me and I cry more. I know I lost it, I can feel it. I think I am crying more because I am angry with myself. Angry for being relieved.

"Do you want me to call Carter?"

"No! Don't call him."

"Abby don't you think you should tell him."

"Please Susan, just don't call him he doesn't need to know."

"Ab... what happened?"

"I fell down the stairs, just an accident." I say trying to cover for Maggie. The doctor walks in and Susan leaves. He asks me what happened and I tell him the same thing. He says my mother was very very upset when I came in, but she is calmed down now and is filling out paperwork.

I hear her yelling at one of the nurses as she comes bursting through the door. She starts screaming at me, saying that the nurses are trying to hurt her and it's my fault for coming here. The doctor seems confused and tries to calm her down. She starts panicking and tries to run out knocking down a bunch of trays. She falls to the floor, her shirt lifting a bit and he sees her arms. When he bends over to help her she freaks and they have to restrain her.

I look down at the blanket as he walks back into my room from carrying her into the other room, sedative putting her to sleep.

"How long has she been bi-polar?"

"Since I was three." he nods and asks me more about the accident. I stick to my story and he doesn't say much about it. They are about to call social services, but I tell them that I am 18, and I choose to stay with Maggie, I help her with her meds. He leaves it be but informs me that I have to stay awhile for observation.

"Abby, did you know that you were pregnant?" he asks slowly.

"Were?" I choke out. He breaths in deep and looks at his hands.

"The fall caused a miscarriage. I'm sorry." he says softly. Tears flow down my eyes a bit. I wasn't planning on an abortion, I know I could have never gone through with it. I was going to have the baby, and now it's gone.

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I hear a knock on the door and look over to see Carter standing there. Thanks alot Susan.

"Hey."

"Hi." I say uncomfortably. We have barely spoken since we broke up.

"They needed someone to fill out some paper work, so they called my Gran." he says, explaining how he found out. Carter's Grandmother was put as a emergency contact after the first time I got hurt at school and my mother was nowhere to be found.

"What happened?"

"Maggie pushed me down the stairs because I was trying to get her to the hospital." I say and stare at my hands as I play with my fingernail.

"Are you ok? The doctor said you were ok." he says sitting down.

"Just a little headache." I say. A tear rolls down my cheek and I don't catch it in time. Carter reaches up and wipes it away and I turn my head from him. He looks away hurt.

"Abby please don't shut me out. I love you."

"Carter, stop."

"No, I won't stop. This is straight bullshit Abby. I know you love me, and I love you. So what is the problem? You haven't given me one good reason why we are broken up... we're moving to fast? Everything was going fine!"

"No it wasn't! You don't know everything Carter!"

"Well then tell me! I don't understand so tell me!" I turn my head and look out the window. He grabs my hand but I pull away.

"Just leave. I don't want to do this right now."

"Ab, please just talk to me. Don't do this, I know you love me."

"Love isn't everything Carter. Sometimes things just don't work out... we were better as friends, ok? We just aren't meant to be together. I'm sorry." he shakes his head a little and steps back.

"Well I guess I should go." I look at him for a minute and then turn so he doesn't see me crying. After a few seconds I hear the door click and he is gone.

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Please Review


	31. A New Start

A/N: short update, longer chapter later tonight or tomorrow! Thanks for all the reviews, I know everyone is itching for Carter to find out and everything and he will I promise! Stay tuned!

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Abby's POV

Walking down the hallway at school I can hear everyone talking about spring break next week. A lot of people are going to Mexico, I was suppose to go but I don't think I really feel like it now. It has been two weeks since I was released from the hospital and I haven't spoken to Carter at all. I see him at school but he doesn't look my way, he is really mad at me, and I don't really blame him.

Susan keeps pressuring me to tell him, but I just don't see the point. I don't want him thinking that we can get back together and I don't want to tell him something like that when he doesn't need to know. The baby is gone, why make things more complicated.

"Abby! Are you totally excited to leave Sunday or what!" Susan yells coming up behind me as I walk outside to my car.

"I.. I don't think I'm going." I say and keep walking while she stops dead in her tracks.

"What! You have to go, you already paid for everything."

"I know, but I can get a refund... I don't want to go with Carter there and things have been so crazy-"

"Exactly, you need a vacation! Come on you can't leave me all alone."

"I'll think about it." I say and get into my car driving off.

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When I pull into the driveway I see Carter's Jeep there. What the hell is he doing here? I really don't want to deal with this right now.

"Hey." I say walking up to the steps, Carter sitting on the top.

"Hey, how have you been?" He says standing up.

"Ok... what are you doing here?" I say looking at him questioningly.

"I just, I wanted to say I'm sorry about the last couple of weeks, and well, Susan said you were thinking of skipping Mexico... and I just, I really want you to go. Don't stay here because of me."

"It's not about you, I just am not up to going." I lie.

"Well, you should. It's going to be a lot of fun... and I don't know, I really want to be friends still Ab. This could be our chance to get back to that." he says looking at me now with the questioningly look.

"Ok, I'll go. But this is going to hard you know-"

"I know, but you are my best friend... still, and I miss you." he says embarrassed and I smile, he is always so cute.

"It's been kind of weird not talking for so long."

"I know, it sucks. I'm sorry that I have been being a jerk, I'm still-"

"Carter, you have not been a jerk. I would have probably done the same thing."

"Still." he says and drops it, looking down at the suddenly fascinating pavement.

"Alright I'll see you Sunday then? Please... it won't be any fun with out you."he asks popping his head back up.

"Yea, alright. I'll see ya Sunday." I say and he walks past me to the driveway as I smile.

I walk inside and call Susan, chewing her out for telling Carter, and then thanking her. Maybe things can go back to normal between us and we can actually be friends again. I can't deny that it was great to talk to him again, I have really missed him. It won't be easy, but this trip might be a new start.

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Please review!


	32. Drunken nights

Ok this chapter has some swearing in it, and sorry about the length! but I hope you like it

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Abby's POV

Stepping out of the van and walking into the hotel I have to admit I am glad I came, it is amazing here. Susan grabs my arm squealing as she drags me up to our room. Carter and I sat together on the plane, and even though we didn't talk about us we are getting alone... probably because we DIDNT talk about us. It is really great to be able to just be friends again.

We walk down to the beach and there is tons of people there. I duck as I see a volley ball flying towards my head.

"Abby! Hey do you wanna play?" Carter says running over to me. I look a little hesitant but Susan pushes me from behind so I follow.

"Um sure." I say and we split into teams. Carter and I are kicking ass I must say. I go for a dive at the same time as he does and we collide into each other. He lands smack on top of me and we start laughing.

He looks at me and stops laughing and I panic. I start to get up and he gets the point climbing off me.

"Susan I think I'm gonna head up to the room for awhile, jet lag." I say walking away before she can object.

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That night everyone heads over to a club. Being Mexico we can sit there and drink all we want so you can imagine the teenagers piling in here. I am dancing with Luka when I see Carter walk over. He looks like he is going to kill him but Jenna, another girl comes over and grabs him to dance. By the end of the song we are having a full out jealousy war. I can see Jenna hanging all over Carter and I can see him looking over at me to make sure I am watching. What a jerk. I know what he is doing, he is trying to hurt me.

After about an hour of this crap I decide to leave. I guess I never realized how much I still wanted to be with Carter until I saw him with someone else. The fact that we are both drunk doesn't help our emotions right now.

I start to walk outside but Carter follows me. Susan sees me leaving and follows also.

"Abby! Where are you going!"

"I'm going back to my room."

"Why, Abby look can we talk?"

"Carter I don't feel like talking right now."

"Why, are you jealous?"

"What! No I'm not, but that is just what you want isn't it! Are you trying to piss me off!"

"No I'm not! I mean god knows Abby doesn't give a shit about me anymore so how could I piss her off!" he screams at me kicking the bench out front.

"Carter.."

"No, whatever." he says and walks back inside.

"Abby, why don't you come back in... ok? Screw him!" Susan says and I hesitate but walk back inside.

Susan and I are dancing when I see Carter walk up, he looks like crap if I must say and he is carrying his 11th beer for the night.

"Abbbyy." he says grabbing my arm.

"What do you want Carter?"

"I just, I just want to talk. Please?" I look at him and then look back at Susan she nods to him and I see that he is crying. I sigh and follow him into the corner.

"What do you want to talk about Carter?"

"I'm sorry about earlier, I.. I .. I" I look at him bugging my eyes a little. He is rambling so bad I have no idea what he is saying.

"Carter-"

"I love you! I don't, I can't be friends with you!"

"Oh my god! Carter, we have been through this before. I'm sorry the last thing I want is to hurt you, but we can't be together-"

"Why! Why fucking not! You have yet to give me a reason!"

"I don't have to!... alright, I don't have to! I don't want to be together, I'm sorry." I say yelling so fast I don't know if he heard me. I slow down and I think I am gonna start crying to. "I'm sorry. Please don't make this harder then it is, we were doing fine."

"Right, friends... I don't want to be friends Abby."

"Well, that is all I can offer right now Carter. and I want it. I want us to be friends, I still care about you."

"Well, I can't offer the same. So forget it." He says and walks away pissed. Oh, remind me again why I came here? This was pointless.

I walk back over to Susan and she throws another drink at me telling me to forget about Carter and that he is just drunk. I decide to forget things for the night and just have fun.

A couple hours later everyone starts to pile out of the club. Susan and I are trying to help Luka into the van when I turn around to see Carter walking out with Jenna and some guys. He makes eye contact with me and then backs her into the wall, starting a nice little makeout session. I get upset of course, whether I dumped him or not it's the fact that he is doing this in front of me, he is trying to hurt me on purpose. Not to mention it's working. I don't won't to see him with another girl, especially this soon.

"Abby, come on." Susan says lightly trying to pull me back into the van but I shrug her off and walk over to him.

"What the hell is wrong with you! You are purposely being an ass!"

"What do you care!" He screams at me and looks away. I start crying so I walk away to the van so he doesn't see me. I look out the window to see Susan yelling at him.

"What is your problem! She loves you ok, I know she does and you are being a complete ass! Just because you guys broke up doesn't give you the right to be a jerk to her, how would you feel if she was purposely kissing guys in front of you!"

"This is none of your business Susan leave me alone."

"You are so clueless." she throws at him and walks away.

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We get back to the hotel and I am finally falling asleep when I feel Susan nudging me.

"What?"

"Abby, this is stupid to ask you but I need you to come here." she asks sounding panicked. I climb out of bed and follow her downstairs. I see Luka and Carter screaming at each other and shoving each other around.

"I know you don't want to see this but I can't get them to stop. If I call security we are gonna get kicked out." she says as I walk over to them

"What are you doing stop it! Hey stop it!" I say pushing myself between them.

"Get him the hell away from me before I kill him Abby!" Luka screams at me.

"Why are you guys fighting?" I ask looking back and forth between them.

"He just came at me for no reason, he's trashed." Luka says spitting out blood. Susan pulls him out of the room, bringing him back to his room I guess.

I look at Carter and he looks at me touching the cut on his forehead. He leans back against the wall and puts his head in between his legs.

"Why were you guys fighting?" I ask but he just shrugs his shoulders. I sit next to him and he looks at me questioningly. I sigh, shaking my head and looking out the window opposite from us.

"I'm gonna be sick." he whispers so I get up and bring him to the bathroom. He pukes for what seems like hours, which is good I guess. He needs to get it out of his system.

After he is done he sits there leaning against the bathtub, much mirroring that night at his house when I was sick.

I look at him for a minute and he looks so broken and hurt, and at the same time so angry. I take his hand and he pulls away. I look down for a second and then bring my hand to his face pulling him to look at me. I pull his head down to my chest and play with his hair. He grabs my shirt in his hands and begins to fall alseep.

"I love you Abby." I hear him whisper and a tear rolls down my cheek. I really messed things up, I need to tell Carter everything I have been feeling.

"I love you too." I say but he doesn't hear me. He is completely out. I lean my head back and fall asleep wondering what I am going to say to Carter.

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Please Review, hint hint... a certain confession coming next chapter


	33. Confessions of a Broken Heart

Pretty long, and a lot of dialogue, hope it's not confusing.

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Abby's POV

When I wake up the next morning I am laying down in Carter's bed. I look around but I don't see him anywhere. I get out of bed and walk out on the balcony, I can see Carter out on the beach from here considering there are only a couple people out. 7am what do you expect.

I throw my hair up and grab my sweatshirt walking outside to the beach. I walk slowly up to Carter and sit down. He doesn't look my way for a while and then he turns his head smiling shyly.

"How's the head?"I ask.

"I feel like a 200 pound person is sitting on top of it." he laughs but I know he isn't kidding.

"What time did you wake up?"

"I don't know pretty early. I put you in bed, you looked pretty uncomfortable."

"Thanks, I was wondering how I got there."

"Ab, I'm really sorry about last night, I was an idiot."

"It's fine-"

"No, it's not. I know I was a jerk and I am sorry." I smile and nod. I can say I forgive him, but I won't forget. I think what he was doing was really crummy. It just proves that we can never be friends again, not like before.

"Carter we really need to talk about all of this, I mean... we can't go back to much has happened?"

"I know, I want to but it's too hard. I love you Abby, I can't just act like I don't."

"I'm not asking you too, but you don't need to go out of your way to get revenge or something because I broke up with you, this is hard for me too!"

"I wasn't trying to get revenge I just, I.. I wanted you to hurt just like I was. and that sucks I know but I can't take it back." he says first yelling and then getting quiet. I know he feels bad, but that doesn't make me feel better.

"This isn't going to work."

"I messed up Ab, I know I shouldn't of kissed her but I.. wait why do you even care!"

"What?"

"Why? You have been doing nothing but pushing me away for weeks. You have made it clear that you don't want to be with me so why do you care!"

"Carter just because I broke up with you doesn't mean I wanted it and it doesn't mean I want to see you making out with other girls in front of me. And the point is whether I cared or not you shouldn't have been doing that on purpose just to piss me off or make me jealous! I never thought you would pull that-"

"I said I was sorry."

"Yea but do you mean it!" I yell getting angry again and he gets silent.

"Abby, of course I do. I don't want to hurt you, I was just being dumb. I know this wasn't the best start of the week, but I do want to try and be friends I really do."

"Carter we can't-"

"Why not? Please Abby I can't just not talk to you."

"Did last night not prove anything to you? We just can't go back to how things were... to much has happened." I say finishing with a whisper. There is some silence and I know he agrees with me but doesn't want to accept it.

"I never thought things would come down to this." he says under his breath but he knows I heard him, I think he wanted me to. He turns and looks at me and I look up meeting his eyes.

"Carter there's something I have to tell you. Something you should know."

"What?" He asks confused. I pause for a minute and look out at the ocean.

"Do you remember that day at school you asked me if I was sick because I was so pale?"

"Yea... so? Are you sick!" He says panicking.

"No! No, I... I took at test that day and... I was pregnant." I say barely audible. He stares at me for a second and blinks a few times.

"You.. you're pregnant?"

"No, I.. I was. That day I fell down the stairs, well I miscarried." he doesn't say anything and I can't look at him I just stare out at the water.

"Why didn't you tell me?"This is the part I have been dreading, he isn't going to understand.

"Because I knew what would happen. You would want to stick by me and help me and that's amazing Carter but I wasn't going to let you throw away your future!"

"Abby of course I would of wanted to support you it was my baby too!"

"I'm sorry, I was only trying to do what I thought was best. And whether I was right or wrong doesn't change things now. I, I miscarried. There is no baby." I say starting to cry and he pulls me into a hug.

"Ab, I wish you had told me. I could have been there, I should have been there."

"I'm sorry." I whisper. It feels so good not having this secret anymore.

"I can't believe this. We were gonna be parents." he says slowly letting everything sink in.

"Yea, I know."

"Is that why you have been so distant? Abby, I love you.. you should have told me. We could have gotten through this together."

"Carter I couldn't tell you, I didn't want you to ruin everything for you. What about college and Med School? I wasn't going to do that."

"What about now? Why are you still pushing me away?"

"Why? Carter we were going to have a baby! I'm only 18 and I was going to have a kid. I'm not ready for this kind of relationship I mean things were getting way too intense."

"Abby getting pregnant wasn't planned. We were safe every time, it could have happened to anyone. I realize how scary that must have been but that has nothing to do with our relationship moving to fast. We were careful, more then most couples it just happened. And I love you I want to be with you."

"I can't Carter. I'm not going to put myself in that siuation again."

"Well then we won't have-"

"It's not just about that! With college coming up and our parents and the baby I just can't handle this."

"What are you talking about.. we have already talked about my mother."

"Yes, we talked about it. It doesn't change the fact that your family hates me. That I am constantly dealing with a pyschotic mother, or that we are going to different colleges-" I'm rambling now.

"We haven't decided that yet."

"Carter... I love you. I do and I won't deny that. But that freaks me out. I have never felt this way and I just feel like we are way to young to be this serious and intense. I don't want this." I say looking away from him and walking away.

"Wait Abby wait!" he says and walks in front of me blocking my path.

"I love you, I love you so much. and I love how we are I don't care how young we are because it's real. It's real. It doesn't matter if we are five or fifty we have always been like this. So what if we have had some set backs, or.. or.. some hard times. We are meant to be together." I start crying because I know how much he wants this, and I want so badly to give in. But I don't, the pessimist side takes over. I look up at him and he kisses me hard and full of emotion. I kiss him back not being able to help myself but I eventually pull back.

"Stop it! Carter you can't kiss me and make things ok!"

"Then tell me what to do!"

"There isn't anything you can do..." I say and there is silence as we stand there. "I sent in my acceptance to Dartmouth." I say quietly and his head jerks up at me. We had planned on going to college together, but after we broke up I sent in my letter.

"What about Northwestern?"

"Carter, you know I can't go there. It's not where I want to be, especially now. I can't see you everyday."

"I can't not see you everyday. Abby, please tell me we can try to be friends."

"I don't know if we can be just friends." I say as both of us cry. I kiss him on the cheek quickly and walk away back to my room dying inside to run back to him.

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Alright guys now he knows, now it's getting them back together! haha, I'm working on it. Please Review.


	34. Double Date

Abby's POV

After a long uncomfortable week, we are finally heading home. After Carter and I talked on the beach that day we didn't talk the rest of the week, things were just really awkward. It really sucks that such a great friendship and bond was ruined for a couple months of being together, but I can honestly say I would do it all over again. What I felt with Carter I will never feel with anyone else, and that's the problem. We just found each other to young.

Boarding the plane I feel like running. I forgot that I have to sit next to Carter, how weird is that going to be. On the way there it was great, we talked and laughed, and I hate flying so it was nice to have him there. Now I would pay 100 dollars to not sit with him. After settling in my seat I see him come down the isle.

"I guess that's my seat." he says shyly. I get up to let him in and he throws his luggage up in the overhead bin. I try to help him make room but our hands touch and he pulls away quickly making me feel really uncomfortable.

"Sorry." we say in unison. I shake my head as he sits down. What a ride this is going to be.

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Returning to school was definitely hard. Everyone was talking about the huge fight we got into at the club, not to mention Carter's steamy kiss. I just wanted to puke. No one knew about the baby, and I knew Carter would never tell no matter how bad things were with us.

After a couple of weeks everyone seemed to drop it. Carter and I never really got back on good terms but we were 'civil' I guess you could say. Maggie continued to stay on her meds, Senior year was coming to an end and everything was going great. Still, I felt like crap. I wasn't happy and it was my own fault.

By the end of May everyone was talking about Prom which was coming up in three weeks. What dress they were wearing, who they were going with. I can't say that I didn't want to go with Carter, but I knew he would never ask me now and I didn't know if it would be a good idea anyways. I knew that he had been hanging out with Sam, one of the better juniors who I actually liked. It was really hard to think about Carter being with someone else, but I have to expect it.

"Hey Abby! I have been trying to find you all day!"Susan says running towards me while I stand at the lockers.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing! Something amazing happened! Mike asked me out!" She says squealing. I can't help but smile, she is so excited... I know how much she has wanted this.

"That's great Suz, he's a great guy."

"Well, there's a little catch."

"...ok.."

"He really wants to do a double with Chris, and well-"

"No, no way. I thought Chris was with Anna?"

"He was, but they broke up and you and Carter are over so it's perfect!"

"I don't think so Susan."

"Please Abby! I really like Mike and come one you need to start going out and doing stuff." I ponder for a minute and I agree even though I know this is going to be a disaster. Chris is a total meathead.

"Thank you! Alright, Friday night 7:00 at the diner ok!" she says and walks away.

I watch Carter as he walks up to the lockers, he has a locker right next to me so we don't have the luxury of avoiding each other much. I smile and he smiles back asking me how I've been.

"same ol' same ol' I guess." he laughs and nods grabbing his books.

"Well... guess I'll see you later." he says shutting his locker.

"Hey John.."

"Yea?" he asks turning back around. I don't really have much to say, what I love you can we forget the past year and start over? Yea right, I just... I want him to stay and talk to me. I miss just hearing his voice.

"Never mind." he smiles and walks away as I lean against the locker sighing.

Please review!


	35. Reconnection

Carter's POV

Friday night, I sit here in the diner with Anna and I should be having a great time, but I'm not. Let's face it Anna is a awesome girl and we have a lot of fun but she isn't Abby. I know that I need to move on though, Abby has made it clear we aren't going to get back together so I figure dating again will help me get over her. It's not really working.

When I see Abby walk in with Chris, Mike and Susan I freak out. Is she on a date? Well, hell so am I so I guess I can't say much but I never prepared myself for her with another guy. She makes eye contact with me and I see her freeze up just like I did. We aren't fighting or anything but we aren't close to being friends like we used to.

I turn my attention back to Anna but I can hear them laughing and joking around. I peek over ever once in awhile and I see her smiling and having a good time. I can't help but feel jealous. I get and walk outside to get some air and Anna follows.

"Is it weird seeing Abby on a date?"

"A little I guess, but hey we are just friends." I say trying to reassure her. We aren't officially together or not, but we have been hanging out a lot lately. She smiles and leans in to kiss me. I freeze as our lips meet, I haven't kissed anyone since Abby, expect for my drunken escapade. It feels so wrong.

She pulls away and I see Abby standing behind us. She looks like she is going to throw up but hides it as we make eye contact. She smiles and continues walking to her car. Anna doesn't see her so I send her back inside telling her I need a minute and I go to talk to Abby.

"Hey." I say startling her.

"Hi John."

"Listen, sorry about that."

"You don't have to explain. I knew you guys were kind of seeing each other I didn't know it was serious."

"Well, it's not really...Abby-"

"Carter it's alright, really. I want you to be happy... I should get back in there."

"Yea Chris? You guys on a date?"

"Kind of. I'm just doubling for Susan."

"Well you seem like you're having a good time."

"Ya, he's actually a really nice guy... well i'll see you later." she says and walks back inside. A nice guy? Guess we aren't talking about the same person, I always thought he was quite the meathead to be honest. I walk back inside after a few minutes and go back to my date.

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A couple of days later, I am sitting in my room looking at the picture of Abby and I from Homecoming Sophomore year. It seems like such a long time ago it's amazing how much has changed since then. With Prom coming up all I can think about is Abby in her dress. She is going to look amazing I'm sure, I can't help but wish we were going together. We have been talking a little bit since the night at the diner but nothing huge.

I walk downstairs and you can imagine my surprise to see Abby sitting right there in my living room.

"Abby?" I ask my expression priceless I am sure.

"Hey Carter." she jumps a little when I walk in but then relaxes like I just caught her stealing or something.

"What are you doing here?"

"She is helping me with graduation plans dear." Gamma says walking past me into the room carrying a stack of folders. She is head of the school board and is in charge of planning out Graduation.

"I got Salutatorian so I have to help with the set up and guest speakers and all that." she says smiling at me.

"Wow, congratulations I didn't know." I find it harder and harder when I hear things about Abby. I used to know this stuff, we told each other everything, now I am in the dark all the time.

"Alright I am missing a folder, I'll be right back." gamma says leaving us alone. I know she didn't forget anything, she knows all about Abby and I.

"Sorry about being here, I didn't know you were home."

"Ab, you don't have to apologize. It's good to see you... we haven't talked much."

"Yea." she replies and then silence takes over.

"So how is everything with your mom going?"

"Good...so far. You know how that is." I laugh and nod.

"So... are you going to prom?" I ask not being able to keep my mouth shut. I doubt she wants to talk about this. She laughs.

"It seems like everyone is talking about that lately...I don't know, maybe. Are you?"

"Yea, last prom you gotta go." she smiles and paces a bit.

"Carter, I'm sorry that things have been so weird. I didn't want that to happen."

"I know...I, I just want you to know that I still care about you, I mean as my best friend. I really miss hanging out with you."

"Me too. I don't want you to think that I stopped caring-"

"I don't think that. It's just... hard." she nods a little and we both laugh a little feeling awkward.

"Ab, I was thinking... we should, we should just keep our plans."

"What do you mean?" she asks totally clueless.

"Well, Prom. I mean, we planned on going together, and I know we aren't together anymore.. but there is no one else I want to go with. We made a pact freshmen year, I don't think I can let you bail out now. " I joke with her but she looks at me like I'm nuts and I don't blame her. We haven't had more then a 20 minute conversation in weeks and now I am asking her to prom.

"I don't know Carter, don't you think that would be a little weird?"

"Maybe, but I still want us to be friends, you know that. And it's been a few weeks I think we could do it. Please? You're the only one I want to go with, together or not. Things have been going great lately... we'll have fun." she looks at me for a minute and then smiles.

"Ok, sure. But only cause I spit shaked on it." she says and I start laughing. I walk back up to my room leaving them alone wishing I could fast forward to prom night.

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Please Review


	36. Prom night

I went from Susan to Carter here, I wanted to add a different view of Abby and Carter in there besides their own lol. Hope you like it.

Susan's POV

"I can't do this." Abby says to me turning to face me, her long ivory dress flowing to the side.

"Abby, you are going to be fine. You and Carter have been best friends for years, don't let your break-up ruin that. Besides he loves you, and you love him so why don't you take this night to fix things!" I know she won't, she is so stubborn. But her and Carter belong together, it seems so weird having them separated. I was really surprised when she told me they were going to go together.

"Susan, you know I can't."

"Fine, but at least have fun tonight. Promise?"

"Yea, I promise."

The guys arrive at my house and we line up for pictures. Everyone looks great and Carter can't stop drooling over Abby. I love watching him when he is like that, it is so cute how head over heels he is for her. I wish she would wake up and realize that she is going to find that anywhere else.

We do the typical pinning of the corsage and such. I laugh when I practically poke a hole in Mike's chest. The flower he got is amazing, pink and red matching my dress. Abby's is white roses, very pretty and I also laugh at Carter as he puts it on Abby. He is shaking so much he can't get it on. I can't believe how nervous he is, but I don't blame him. They are both too cute acting like they are just friends. Whatever, they are so in love. I wish I could snap Abby back into reality. For years I have wanted a relationship like theirs, how can she not see how perfect they are?

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When we arrive at the dance, I am in aw watching Abby. She looks absolutely amazing tonight and I think to myself that this is going to be harder then I thought. She keeps smiling at me making me melt.

_When you say nothing at all - by Allison Krauss_ comes on and I pull her out on the dance floor. It is so great being able to hold her again, it has been so long. She seems to be completely comfortable tonight which I love. It has been such a struggle these past couple of months. Every time I try to get close to her she pulls away. Not tonight though, she rests her head on my chest and lets me hold her close.

Towards the end of the dance they announce the king and queen. I really wish that Abby and I could be crowned together and I am surprised when they announce our names. She starts laughing and smiling like crazy and drags me up to the stage. We share the traditional dance and I look around at everyone talking. They must think that we are back together. I see Susan squealing in the background. She has really been pushing to get us back together since we agreed to go to prom together. I only wish I could say that we were together again, Abby and Carter.. the way it should be.

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"Hey come on last dance?" I ask pulling Abby out and she laughs getting dragged along. Tonight turned out to be amazing, I only wish I could kiss her and tell her how much I love her. I don't even need to pull her to me this time she leans right into my chest and we dance forgeting everyone here.

"Ab?" I whisper.

"yea?"

"You look so beautiful tonight. I'm so glad we came together."

"Me too. I had a lot of fun." she smiles looking up at me.

I caress her cheek and lean my forehead against hers, I am pushing it I know but I can't help it.

"It's so hard not being able to kiss you." I whisper and for a minute I expect her to push me away but she doesn't. She pulls me closer putting her head back on my chest and I rest my head on hers.

"I love you, I still love you... more then ever." I whisper in her ear. She looks up at me looking sad and places her hand on my cheek. We continue dancing like that and I place my forehead back on hers just like before.

"Abby-" I start but she reaches up and kisses me. I put my hand behind her head pulling her in, not wanting this to end. We stand there kissing passionately, and slowly full of emotion but she suddenly pulls back. She looks like a deer in headlights realizing what she has done, and she walks away.

"Abby wait!" I yell running on her tail. We get outside and I catch up to her pulling her into another kiss. She resists at first then melts into it. This time I pull back.

"Tell me you didn't feel that. That is love, real love. I don't care if we are to young, I don't care about our parents or college or anything else! I care about you, and us! I love you!"

"I love you too, but-"

"No, no buts." I say and take her face in my hands."No buts."

"Carter, I.. I can't do this."

She starts walking away running across the street towards the limo. I yell after her but she doesn't stop and runs right out into the road with in oncoming car.

"Abby!" I scream and run out pushing her away before the car slams into me.

Please Review!


	37. It's complicated

Alright here is another chapter for everyone, pretty long so enjoy!

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Abby's POV

Sitting here in the hospital waiting room I have tears streaming down my face, blood staining my dress, and only one thing running through my head- this is your fault. Why the hell was I thinking running out there like that, if I had been smarter Carter wouldn't be here right now.

"This is your fault." I hear Susan say to me and I look up at her surprised.

"What?"

"You have been completely selfish when it comes to you two lately Abby, and he has been trying so hard. Look where it got him-"

"Susan!" I hear Mike yell but she gets up and leaves. I never expected something like that to come from Susan but I can't help but admit how right she is. I get up and go over to the reception area to see if I can see Carter yet.

I flash back to earlier when he pushed me away from the car. I looked up to see him lying in the middle of the road, bleeding from the head and unconscious. I ran over to him and Susan and Mike came running out, having seen us run out. The ambulance took him away and I haven't heard anything since. I can't believe this is happening. I can't lose him now.

"Abby?" the nurse says walking outside looking around for someone to answer.

"Yea? Is he ok?"

"Yea, he is asking for you." I swallow hard and follow her. I have never been so nervous.

"Hi." I say walking in the room standing by the door.

"Hey... come here." he says seeing that I am standing still. I sit down next to the bed and he grabs my hand.

"Are you ok?" he asks and I start crying. Me? I'm fine you're the one in the hospital bed.

"I'm fine, are YOU ok? What were you thinking!"

"I don't know it was just instinct I guess. Besides I'm fine, just a little concussion and a messed up knee. They were just concerned cause I wasn't waking up... but I'm fine...hey" he touches my cheek as I cry harder. I was so scared that he was going to be really hurt.

"I'm sorry about all of this, I shouldn't have ran out in front of that car, I didn't even see it."

"I know. It's not your fault." I roll my eyes and he laughs.

"I love you." I whisper.

"I love you too."

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Carter was released the next morning with nothing more then a few bruises and some crutches. He was really lucky, I guess the car had slowed down enough so the impact wasn't to bad, but it was still a car.

I'm walking up his driveway carrying a card and balloons and I am sweating like crazy. I don't know what to say to him, I mean all of this is my fault and we haven't really talked about what happened last night for obvious reasons. I walk around the corner and up the front steps when I see Susan ringing the doorbell. I immediately turn around but she sees me.

"Abby!"

"Hey."

"Where are you going.. aren't you going up to see Carter?"

"Yea, well I was...I can come back later-"

"No, Ab.. I'm really sorry about yelling at you yesterday, that was really shitty of me." I laugh at her words and I nod. I know she was just freaking out, I mean her and Carter are close too. It has to be hard being there for the both of us.

"I know, and you were right I have been being selfish."

"Hey, you know I support you.. I just, I was scared."

"It's ok.. listen can you give this to him?" I ask handing her my card. She looks at me funny.

"Why aren't you going up?"

"I can't. Not right now, maybe later... will you just give it to him and tell him I'll stop by later or something."

"Sure." I give her a hug and she walks inside as I walk back down the driveway. I want to see him, but I just can't bring myself to walk up those stairs. I guess I'll let him read the card first. Why do things have to be so complicated?

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"Knock knock." I hear Susan say as she knocks on the door. I smile and wave her in.

"Thank god, I thought you were my mother." we both laugh, I knew that would brighten her down face.

"Still the joker I see... hows the knee?"

"Little sore, no big deal. I just tore some muscle."

"JUST... well I brought you some balloons and lots of cards from everyone." She hands me the pile and I laugh at the balloons. There from Abby, I can tell because of the one with Spongebob on it. She used to pick on me for watching it on Saturday mornings, but hey, there was nothing else on T.V. and she was sitting right next to me laughing too. Only Abby would remember that, I laugh to myself.

"Did she leave?" I ask and Susan looks at me confused then nods.

"Yea, she told me to give you this." she says and hands me a card with 'John' written on the front.

"You know, I think last night really gave her a slap in the face. She was really worried Carter... she does love you."

"I know she does, It's just complicated. I don't know, I really thought last night was it, that we were finally getting back together... but she panicked and you know the rest."

"Well, give her some time, I know she'll come around." I smile and look out the window praying that she is right.

"Your going to be able to go to graduation right?" She asks.

"Of course. I can't miss it, even if I have to hop up the stage." she laughs and we sit and talk for awhile before she leaves so I can eat Lunch.

I grab Abby's card when I get back upstairs and I peel it open. I pull it out of the envelope and open it slowly, a piece of paper and a picture falls out, it's from hawaii, we were only 14 and we were on vacation with my family. We are sitting on the beach as Gamma took a picture of us. I can't get over how young we look and I laugh a little thinking about how much I liked Abby then, but wouldn't admit it. I always wanted that picture, but gamma gave it to Abby and she loved it just as much as I did so it never happened.

I set it on the stand next to my bed and begin reading her letter...

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Please Review!


	38. The Letter

Carter,

I hope that you liked the picture, I know how much you always wanted it. It makes me laugh a bit looking at all of the pictures of us when we were younger, how much things have changed. You have always been my best friend, my partner in crime, my right hand, and even though these past couple of months have been hard I still think that.

I am so sorry about how everything has turned out. For so long I had dreamed of being with you and then once it happened I panicked. The feelings have for you are so strong, and I guess it scared me thinking about how real and mature our relationship was. We have always had a connection, but once we started dating it only grew and I felt like I could spend the rest of my life with you and that would be fine. That freaked me out, I questioned my feelings and yours because I believed we were to young to feel this way and to be so intense. But, the fact is that I do feel that way, I do love you and no matter how scared I was or am that feeling isn't going away. When I found out I was pregnant that just pushed my doubts about us. I knew being the good guy you are that you would stay in Chicago and help me, throwing away college and all the plans you had. I couldn't ask that of you, so I broke it off. Whether that was right or wrong, I don't know, but I know that I felt like it was the best decision I could make at the time.

After spring break and all of the stuff that happened down there I was hurt and broken just like you. I realized after seeing you with another girl how much I didn't want to lose you, and I knew that I had to give you some kind of explanation for breaking it off. I was so tempted to fall back on us and forget about everything I was doubting but I couldn't and I'm glad I didn't. As hard as it was I know that if I just forgot everything and we got back together, I would only end up hurting you because I still had doubts and I was too scared. I know I probably should have told you about the baby but I can't change that and I can't change what I did, but I do want to be with you.

Right now I am sitting in my room, just coming home from the hospital. I was so scared when you were hit. I couldn't believe that you pushed me out of the way, or that I was stupid enough to just run out in the road without looking for that matter. After being with you at prom and slowly falling back into our old pattern I panicked, letting stubborn pessimist Abby take over, you know her very well. But John, I do love you. I hope that we can try to forget these past couple of months and start over. I don't know what next year will bring with college and meeting new people, but I know that we can do it, no matter how hard... cause it IS real.

Abby


	39. Graduation

Thanks for all the reviews, I was a little iffy about the letter but I am glad you liked it. Here is a nice long update, enjoy!

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Carter's POV

It has been a three days since I read Abby's letter and I have yet to talk to her. I couldn't believe what she wrote, but I have to admit I couldn't wipe the smile off my face that day. the only thing is every time I pick up the phone I can't bring myself to dial her number. What if she changes her mind again? She has been so back and forth with us and how she feels, I can't bear rejection yet again.

Graduation is in four days, I still can't get over it. It still seems like I should be sitting in homeroom, goofing off with my friends and waiting to get the hell out of here. Now that that day is finally approaching, I'm not sure I am ready for it.

"Earth to Carter!" Susan yells and my head springs up. I didn't realize she was standing there.

"Hey, sorry."

"What's up? You seemed a little out of it.."

"Nah, just thinking about graduation and stuff."

"I know, I can't believe that it is only a couple of days away. Seems like just yesterday we were scared little freshmen." We laugh thinking of how much we have grown up these past couple of years.

"So how are you feeling?"

"Ah, I'm fine I think I'll be able to walk for graduation as long as I use a brace." she smiles.

"Well, that is kind of why I am here. I grabbed your cap and gown for you. You should see Abby, she looks like she is drowning in hers.." she says laughing and then pausing. "Oh, sorry Carter." Funny how things always come back to Abby.

"No, it's fine... how is she?" I ask sincerely. I feel bad that I haven't called her but I don't know what to say.

"She's alright, she said you haven't said anything to her about the letter...Did you read it?"

"Um, yea... I have been avoiding that conversation I guess."

"Well, she told me some of what she said.. I mean I thought this is what you wanted? You don't want to get back together?"

"I do, I mean I love her but I just... I don't want her to end up changing her mind again.. it's so hard with her and I just don't want to get hurt again."

"I know that she has been... difficult..." she laughs. "but Carter, you know Abby.. and you know that she loves you... she is just scared, and after the accident she really woke up." she smiles and I smile back turning my head to look out the window. Silence ensumes as I debate about spilling my guts. I have to talk to someone about this though, I don't know what to do now.

"I signed up for the summer program at Northwestern." I say turning to look at her. She looks confused.

"What... when did you decide that?"

"I don't know, after Abby and I broke up I just wanted to leave as soon as I could... and it just seemed like the perfect plan."

"When?"

"Two weeks.." her mouth drops a little.

"What! That early!"

"It starts at the end of June, It was a great oppurtunity to get extra classes in, and get away from the stupid town and all the problems I was having. Now that Abby wants to get back together, I don't know what to do."

"and you haven't told her have you.."

"No." I say slowly, wondering how I am going to tell her.

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Pinning my cap to my head, I can't help but smile. I am graduating today, not just as a top student, but as salutatorian. I have worked really hard to make sure that I could get into a great college, and I did it. Now that it's here, I'm terrified.

It has been almost a week since I gave Carter my letter and I have yet to talk to him. I thought about picking up the phone but I just figured I should wait for him to call me, he needs time to think about it. I have put him through so much these past couple of months. I am a little nervous about seeing him tonight considering we haven't talked about anything yet but at the same time I am excited, I haven't seen him since the night of the accident, of prom.

"I think I am going to puke." I say to Susan as I turn to look at her.

"ha, you are going to be fine."

"I can't give speeches, I ramble when I get nervous."

"Abby stop you are going to be fine!" she says grabbing my shoulders and shaking me back into reality. She walks over to the mirror and starts doing her hair.

"So.. did you go see Carter yesterday?" I ask and she seems to freeze, her smile turning into a frown.

"Yea, he seems to be walking better." she says avoiding eye contact, playing with her make-up.

"Did he say anything about the letter, he still hasn't called or anything... maybe he hasn't read it yet.."

"He did. I think he is just scared to call... give him some time... he'll talk to you." she says talking fast and brushing it off like she doesn't want to talk about it.

"Susan your hair looks fine, can we go now!" I yell jokingly... she has been fixing her hair for almost an hour.

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Getting in line at school I start panicking when I realize that I have to sit next to Abby through this entire ceremony. She is giving her speech, and with my leg we both have to sit in the front row. I swear someone hates me. I shouldn't be this nervous about sitting next to her, I mean jesus she is my best friend... I guess I just feel really awkward.

She smiles at me as we start to walk down the aisle and I melt. She looks so cute in her gown, her gold sash matching mine except for the silver lining showing her Salutatorian status.. I feel so proud of her right now. As they start to announce her I can tell she is nervous, she is playing with her hands and biting her lip. I grab her hand and she looks up surprised. I squeeze it and whisper to her.

"You're going to be great." she smiles and stands up walking on stage. Her speech is amazing, and she talks with such sophistication it makes me smile. She has always been too mature for her own good.

After many speeches, many songs, and many relived memories our class is announced and our hats are thrown. I look around and see Abby and Susan are jumping up and down yelling with all the girls, all of the guys celebrating, all the parents crying. I can't believe this is it.

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So not back together yet, sorry... but don't worry carby action coming soon! haha. I wasn't sure about writing Abby's speech out or not, so if you would like me to let me know and I will...keep up the reviews!


	40. Back to you

Carter's POV

Day after graduation and all I want to do is go back to high school. I laugh to myself thinking of how dumb I must sound to all the younger classmen, but hey college is scary and I am leaping in two months earlier then everyone else.

I'm throwing a graduation party later tonight, just a bunch of people to celebrate and say goodbyes. I haven't talked to Abby yet, last night I told her that we would talk tonight and we left it at that. It wasn't really the time to get into things. I don't know how I am going to tell her I'm leaving...

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A couple of hours later everyone is here, laughing and having a good time by the pool. It is weird thinking I won't be seeing these people anymore. I spot Abby and Susan in the pool getting thrown around and I laugh. When I see Abby get out and walk inside I follow her.

"Hey!" I say startling her a bit.

"Carter.. hi, I didn't see you there."

"Um, can we talk? I have something for you.." I ask reaching for her hand. She accepts and follows me upstairs. I pull out her present I have under my bed and hold it in my lap as I sit on the bed. She stays standing leaning against my desk and I can tell she is uncomfortable.

"I'm sorry that I never came by to see you, I just figured you would call-"

"I know, I'm sorry that I never called.. I did read the letter, I just... I needed some time to think I guess." I say and she nods. I hesitate speaking slowly, "Is this really what you want... cause I don't want to get hurt again Abby."

"Yes.. it is. I know I have been stupid these past couple of months but I was scared and I don't know... I do want this though, I love you." I smile and I am sure I look like a grinning fool but I don't care. I reach for her hand and pull her in between my legs. She leans into me and I kiss her neck as she climbs into my lap.

"I love you too." I whisper in her ear and I can hear her sniffle a little.

"Hey, what's wrong?"

"Nothing, I just missed you... us." I smile and kiss her not holding back. This is how it is suppose to be.

"We can do this, I know we can. But you have to talk to me this time-" I say.

"I know, I will... I'm sorry. "

"Listen Ab, there is something I have to tell you-" I start to say planning on telling her about the summer program. Before we start discussing getting back together she should know.

"Carter! Get down here man Josh is about to wreck Chris you gotta see this!" I hear someone yell up the stairs. Great the last thing I need is a fight. I sigh and stand up telling Abby I'll be right back.

After about 20 minutes I am still cleaning up the mess they made, food everywhere... picnic table broken. At least no one got hurt. I see Abby walk outside looking for me.

"Hey, sorry about that." I say walking over to her.

"No big deal, but uh... Maggie just called me... she sounds bad, I gotta go." I pout, considering it is only 9:30pm and we still have so much to talk about, but I know how maggie can get.

"Do you want me to go with you?" I ask concerned. Abby has to deal with this crap so much, she deserves some help.

"No! Carter, it's your party...I'm sorry I have to leave now but, can we talk more tomorrow?" she asks in a hopeful tone.

"Yea, of course. We still have a lot to talk about." I say and she nods. She pauses and then turns to leave unsure whether she should kiss me or not, we are technically back together but it's going to take sometime for it to just be back to normal. I grab her hand and she stops turning around and I kiss her. It's going to take sometime but I think we are going to be ok. Just before she reaches the door she turns around.

"Hey was there something you had to tell me?" she asks thinking about a couple of minutes ago in my bedroom. I pause wondering if I should tell her but I decide not to, I just can't. I shake my head no and she leaves as I stand there feeling torn.

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Ok, they are back together... hope you liked it! Please review!


	41. 8 days

Abby's POV

Sitting on the bench by my window sill I keep thinking back to my conversation with Carter yesterday. I went over to his house to finish our conversation from the party and we ended up talking all night. Everything seems to be going back to normal thank god, but I still feel like there is something he isn't telling me.

"Why the long face?" Susan ask me as she reads her magazine on my bed, her feet dangle in the air.

"Just thinking about yesterday when I went over to Carter's..." I say not taking my eyes off the window. I wish I could take back these past couple of months, take back everything that happened.

"So I take it he told you then?" She says getting up and walking over to sit next to me a sympathetic look on her face. I look at her confused for a minute and then I shake my head yes. I don't know what she is talking about, but I know he isn't telling me something. If I have to play along to find out so be it. "Ab, don't worry about it, I mean you can still drive up there and see him... I'll even go with you if you want."

"Yea.. right, I know... It just sucks you know." I say pulling words from nowhere. Drive where?

"Yea, I can't believe they would start so early, I mean people are just graduating and they have to up and leave two frigin weeks later. I mean come on." She says rolling her eyes and talking with her hands. I am so lost right now, two weeks? Carter's leaving? I laugh and nod begging her to continue... how come he didn't tell me?

"I say we send them a hate letter... Dear Northwestern, you suck and so do your summer programs." she laughs as she continues but I don't hear anything she is saying. Summer program? What?

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I drive over to Abby's house hoping to surprise her with the present that I made. I was going to give it to her the night of my graduation party but she left before I got the chance.

"Hi John, Abby's out back." Maggie says answering the door. I walk out back to see Abby swinging on the tree swing looking completely spacey.

"Hey!" I say tickling her from behind. She stands up quickly wiping around to see who's there. I laugh but she doesn't look to pleased.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you." I say and she smiles half heartedly.

"I didn't know you were coming over." she says and backs up a little kicking the dirt under the tree.

"Well, I just thought I would surprise you, you didn't look very busy." I joke but she doesn't laugh at this either. What is up with her? Everything was great yesterday. She walks past me slowly over to the steps of the deck. I follow and sit next to her placing the bag I brought next to me.

"What's up you seem pissed?"

"Nothing."

"Ok.. well did I do something?" she looks at me and I see a tear fall down her cheek. "Hey... what's up?" I ask reaching to wipe her cheek but she pushes my hand away giving me an annoyed look. She stands up quickly looking down at me.

"Were you ever planning on telling me or were you just going to send me a postcard!" she says sarcastically and my eyes bug out a little. How did she find out about that? Shit. After I don't answer, standing there like a guilty idiot she walks past me to the door but I grab her hand and pull her back.

"Wait, Ab. Look, I was going to tell you but everything was going so great-"

"So were you ever going to tell me? Jesus you told Susan before you told me!"

"She told you?"

"WHAT! I that all you care about is that she ratted you out?"

"No Ab-"

"Yes she did tell me, but she thought I already knew like maybe my boyfriend and best friend would have told me he was leaving but jeez what was she thinking?" yep. She is pissed.

"I was going to tell you... soon, I just... every time I tried I couldn't... look we can still do this, I know it sucks but-"

"I can't believe this. We finally get back together and you're leaving. I have been trying to push you away for so long but you wouldn't let me, you convinced me that we were going to be fine and I believed you. I gave in and let myself be with you and now..." she is to angry to finish her sentence it seems. I feel bad, but I was going to tell her.

"Ab, I didn't plan this. I applied for the summer program when we were still broken up, I didn't think we were ever going to get back together and I just wanted to leave as soon as I could!" She bites her lip as it quivers, a sure sign she is holding back the tears. I reach out for her but she steps back further.

"Things aren't the same... if you want a relationship you have to be here to build it. It isn't just going to go back to the way it was, it's been four months!"

"I know that-"

"Well then what? How is this going to work?" she says her voice cracking as she begins to cry harder. I pull her to me and she lets me.

"Why did you let me open myself up to get smacked in the face? You should have told me." She whispers, her face buried in my shoulder.

"I know, I'm sorry." I say and she pulls back wiping her eyes.

"When will I ever see you?"

"I can still come home some weekends... I know it's not a lot but once the year starts we can plan holidays, and some weekends.. it will be easier then." I say trying to convince her but more convincing myself. The more I say it out loud the more ridiculous it sounds. We have only been back together for three days, we can barely have a decent conversation without a little awkwardness, how the hell are we going to pull this off?

"This isn't going to work is it?" she says slowly, barely auditable.

"Ab-"

"We don't even know each other anymore, what's it going to be like in a couple weeks? Or months?" she whispers not wanting to believe it either.

"I love you.. we can do this." I say as a last attempt. I won't fight with her about this, because I know where she is coming from, and I know she is right. I won't be able to come home for awhile considering the summer program is going to be hard, it is all the top students. Then once the year starts and things wind down, she'll be half way across the county. Granted Northwestern is in Illinois, but it is also six hours away.

She doesn't answer or look up at me and she knows she doesn't need to. She knows I agree and that I am fighting it because I want to be with her so much. She grabs my hand and I pull her into a hug. She kisses me slowly, sadly. Almost as if saying goodbye.

"Maybe I can back out." I say pulling out my cell phone frantic. I am shaking as Abby grabs my phone.

"Carter you leave in 8 days, you can't back out. Besides, if you did I would feel guilty, I don't want to ruin this for you."

"But I want to stay here, I want to be with you. I don't want this anymore." She shakes her head at me telling me not to cancel, showing me that it would be the wrong decision because I clearly don't see that. She sticks the phone in my coat pocket and kisses me. I look at her pleading with my brain to think of something to keep her from walking away but I fail. She turns around slowly, dropping my hand and walking inside. She stops at the door and looks back one more time before entering her house, as I stand there broken.

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Ok, don't get to mad at me for this chapter... this is a carby and they will end up together in the end, but come on... you didn't think it was going to be that easy right? Please Review.


	42. Memories

Abby's POV

After Carter left last night I pretty much moped around the house feeling sorry for myself. That is what I get for waiting so long. It just doesn't seem fair, we are finally back together, and then he has to leave.

When I woke up this morning I saw a bag sitting on the table downstairs. Maggie said she found it on the back porch, Carter left it here last night. When I opened it I couldn't help but cry. It was a photo album, something he must have spent a lot of time on. Flipping through the pages I feel like I am flipping through my childhood. There are pictures of us, 4 years old sitting eating popsicles. One when we were 7, Carter fell off the monkey bars and broke his arm... he was twirling me around in his wheelchair as I sat on his lap in the hospital. A few from plays, and soccer games. I come to a picture of us with Bobby and I am surprised to see it.. I never have seen this before, Carter must have put it away. There are a lot from sixth grade graduation, and our first dance. What dorks. I come to a picture of Carter, Susan and I at the lake. I am on Carter's shoulders as he runs from Susan, that makes me laugh remembering this. So many memories.

I turn the page and stop. This is filled with pictures of high school, Homecomings.. Carter's home run winning baseball game where I am hugging him as he twirls me around, hanging out by the pool, and then senior year. Tons of pictures of us together, in love... I never knew half of these were taken. It is amazing how much of life revolves around Carter, what is it going to be like not having him there anymore? Sometime I think I should have stayed in Minnesota last year, but then again I don't. I would do it all over again if I could.

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"Abby, I really thought you knew I feel like such an idiot." Susan apologizes as I tell her about my argument with Carter.

"No, hey don't. I was playing along like I did... I just wanted to know." I sigh and she stands up quickly.

"Let's do something.. let's go out, you need to get this off of your mind." I shake my head and make a face. I don't feel like doing anything.

"Come on Ab, you can't sit here and mope all frigin week." she says encouragingly.

"I know, but I am really not going to be any fun right now-"

"Well, then let's just go get something to eat and talk. You need to get out of this house... and, hey! Put down that damn album!" she yells as I start to pick it up. I have been looking at it all day.

She convinces me to walk down to the diner with her and we head out. It does feel nice to leave the house and take a break. It really is depressing sitting around thinking about him leaving.

We walk into the diner and I almost trip over Susan as she stops dead in front of me.

"Jeez, are you trying to kill me." I laugh then I see why she stopped. Sitting in our corner booth is Carter. I look at Susan and she throws her head back shrugging her shoulders.

"I give up." she says walking over to sit down as Carter comes over to talk to me.

"Hi."

"Hi.."

"So.. how are you?" he asks trying to make conversation. Failing. How am I?

"Alright I guess... I got your present. It was really great Carter." he smiles and I can't help but grin.

"I thought it would make you smile, it worked for me." he says sadly.

"It did, I was funny seeing how much we have grown." I laugh and so does he but then silence consumes.

"So what time are you leaving Sunday?" I ask slowly. I was going to avoid the subject but what's the point. He leaves in three days, I'm not going to act like he isn't.

"Um.. early, probably 9." I nod and he puts his hands in his pocket.

"This is weird." he says with a smile and I laugh a little.

"Kind of... I guess I should go sit-" I say wanting to stay but feeling bad about Susan sitting there twitling her thumbs. Besides, this is really uncomfortable.

"Yea, sorry."

"Can I stop by and say goodbye?" I ask hopefully. I know it will be hard as hell but I think I should at the least.

"Please." he says softly giving me a half smile, sighing. I hug him and he pulls me close, I can feel him breathe in deep. I let go first and smile, turning to walk back to Susan. I can see her smiling sympathetically at me as I walk towards her and then look back to Carter. I turn around too look also when I get to my seat to see him walk out the diner.

"Well, he didn't have to leave." she says.

"I think he was leaving anyways."

"So.. you guys seemed to be friendly?"

"I guess.. it's really awkward acting like everything is fine. I don't know if I can do this." I say feeling my eyes start to well up.

"Hey, come on it's Abby and Carter... you guys will work it out, you always have.. right?"

"I always thought so... but this is different, I mean I don't think it's going to work." I say placing my chin on my hand and looking out the window.

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So I started off with the idea of finishing this fic after they were out of high school, but I think I am going to just keep it going... what do you think? Please review!


	43. last kiss

Abby's POV

Sunday morning I wake up to my buzzing alarm clock. I am not looking forward to the day at all, today is the Carter is leaving. I told him that I would go see him before he left, to say goodbye, but I almost feel like bailing. I don't know if I can go through with it.

I roll out of bed and throw on some jeans and a shirt, walking downstairs to see Eric sitting in the living room with maggie.

"ERIC! What are you doing here." I say as he hugs me.

"I got in last night, but you were sleeping. I'm home for the summer... I decided not to stay there."

"That's so great, I thought I was going to have to drag myself up there and bring you home."

"Come on let's go for a walk and talk." he says pushing me towards the door and looking back giving mom a nod. What is he up to?

"So why are we walking? You hate going for walks."

"Well, I've been gone so long I feel left out. I want to catch up."

"What did she tell you?"

"Well.. about Carter, the baby.. the stairs.. Ab you should have told me-"

"I know, I'm sorry but you couldn't have done anything... besides it's in the past I don't want to talk about it."

"Abby you went through a lot and you can't just brush it off like everything else. You always do that."

"Don't lecture me... you haven't been here ok you don't know! I had my time to deal with it and it's over. I don't want to talk about it." I say starting to walk back to the house.

"Then what about Carter.. he's leaving.. today! What happened there, you aren't going to try again?"

"Look, we were going to, we were. But he's leaving and he's going to be gone all summer we can't just jump into a relationship again-"

"I never thought that you guys would break up if you guys got together I mean you guys are so great together." he says asking for a explanation that I don't feel like giving. Looks like Maggie told him to talk to me since she is incapable. The thing is I wanted to put all this behind me, I was finally moving on.

"Well things don't always work out like planned." I say and walk back inside. I pass the clock in the hall reading 8:44 and I realize that Carter is leaving in 20 minutes so I grab my keys and head over to his house.

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"Carter!" I yell shutting my door and running up the drive way to Carter where he is getting into the car.

"Ab, hey! I didn't think you were coming."

"Sorry, I got delayed... so it's really happening then?"

"Yea, I guess so.." he says as we walk over to the steps and sit down. His parents aren't even out here saying goodbye, just gamma sitting in the car. Unbelievable.

"Are you nervous?"

"Not really, I'm more nervous about getting homesick then being there." he laughs and I smile. Carter was never that great with being away from home. I remember camp in fifth grade he was ready to break by the 2nd day.

"Carter... I'm sorry about how everything turned out-"

"Stop. It's done." he says lightly and grabs my hand.

"You know if things were different, I mean if I wasn't going-"

"I know." I say shaking my head not wanting to hear him say that this stupid program is the only reason we aren't together.

"I'm gonna miss you." I whisper and he brings his hand up to my cheek, pulling me to look at him.

"Me too."

"John.. I'm sorry but we have to go if we are going to make it." Gamma says apologetically.

We both stand up and I brush off my pants. He pulls me into a hug and I start crying, damn. I knew I would but I was hoping to hold it until he left. He squeezes me tighter and kisses my forehead.

"I love you Abby."

"I love you too." I say and I kiss him. Maybe I shouldn't but I can't help it, I need to kiss him one last time. He doesn't pull away just kissed me back leaning his forehead against mine.

He smiles sadly and climbs into the car. I wipe away my tears and smile fakely, waving as the car pulls away. I walk over to my car, shutting the door and letting the tears fall.

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sorry its so short but Im not good with goodbyes... please review!


	44. New Surroundings

Thanks for the reviews everyone! I decided to continue on through college...hope you like it

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Abby's POV

Sitting on the many boxes I look around my room in disbelief. I cannot seem to grip the fact that I am leaving for college today. It seems so crazy how fast the summer went by, and yet how slow. I had forgotten how hard it was not having Carter around last year until he left. We talked a bit on the phone at first, and then less and less... I think it was to hard for us. We ended up playing phone tag for awhile and then we just stopped... it has been three weeks since we last talked for more then five minutes.

Susan left yesterday for UIC, ok so that is only 20 minutes away but it is still not here... at least I know I can see her when I come home. We had a pretty messy goodbye, thank god I don't have to say farewell to anymore of my friends. I said goodbye to Eric last week, he had to fly back for school... I have to admit that I was comforted that he wouldn't be alone with Maggie... he just doesn't know how to handle her. Then again, I am also worried about her living alone.

I grab the last of my clothes, throwing them in the box and taping it shut. Posters are off the wall, bed sheets stripped, closets bare. I feel like I am moving out for good, and I guess in a way I am. I am finally leaving this hellhole I call a home.

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The cab pulls up to Dartmouth and my mouth drops. I never got the chance to come visit due to expenses but it is better then the pictures. Maggie hates flying, and I really didn't want her to come, so I shipped all of my belongings overnight and picked them up once I got here. Lugging those boxes up the stairs wasn't all that fun. My roommate, Andrea..or Andy, is really great but she seems to he extremely hyper.. and well, I'm not. Hopefully things work out ok.

I sit down that night after unpacking and meeting more people then I have in my life and I decide to try Carter.

_'Hey it's John, you know what to do, Leave it! Beep'_

"Hey Carter it's me, umm... just got to school. Kind of crazy, I know what you are talking about now. I don't know, just wanted to say hi... um, call me if you get this." I say and hang up sighing. I doubt he will call back.

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'call me if you get this'

I go to dial her number when I realize that she is probably sleeping by now, and if she isn't she is going to have one pissed off roommate if I call. I haven't talked to her in so long, it was great to hear her voice. I guess I just have been avoiding it, It's so hard.

Everything is so great here, I am really glad that I came early it gave me a head start on meeting new friends and getting settled. The first week or so was hard, I wanted so badly to go back home and see Abby, but things got easier as I met new people and as we stopped talking. I think that kept my mind off her, it's the nights I can stand. Lying in bed... having nothing better to do then think... about her. It seems so weird that I haven't seen her face in almost three months, I mean she was gone all junior year but I saw her for christmas, and it was different then.. I wasn't so head over heels. Well maybe I was.

"Hey John, do you want to head down to the east dorms?" I look up to see Kate ask. She's my roommate's girlfriend, she keeps trying to set me up with her sorority sister. It's starting to annoy me I have to admit, I mean I don't want a girl, she'll never compare. No one here knows about Abby really. All they know is she was my best friend from home and that I have a bigillion pictures of us in my room. I don't like to talk about it much.

"No thanks I have tons of work." I say rolling my eyes and she shrugs walking off. Thank god. I really do have work but It's not due for days... oh well.

I decide to call Abby anyways, It's only 12:11 and I don't care if she is sleeping. I miss her and talking to her.

'_Hey you have reached Abby's phone leave me something great and maybbbeee i'll call you back._' I laugh listening to that, I do every time.

"Hey you, it's me. I just got your message, sorry. Umm.. sorry I haven't called lately I have been really busy" I lie. "Hope your first day went well and I guess I will talk to you later... I miss you Ab... bye."

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Please review... So this whole college thing is new, I don't think I will be writing much of them alone at college cause this is a Carby, and I want to write scenes of them actually talking to each other... I don't know hope you like it.


	45. Home Sweet Home

Ok sorry about the lack of update, this past week has been insane. Here is a long update for ya, switching of POV's alot hope it's not confusing! Thanks for the reviews!

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Abby's POV

The snow is falling hard, creating a complete white out as the EL train speeds through Chicago. It is crazy how much I have missed this place, and I am really glad to be back. Winter Vacation started last week and I am just getting home. I decided to stay in New Hampshire for a few days with Ryan, this really great guy that I have been seeing for a couple of weeks.

When I first started school things were really hard. I was worried about my mom and Eric, and I was really missing my friends... especially Carter. We haven't talked that much lately, he has his own life at Northwestern and I was busy with my own. I didn't tell him about Ryan, I just... ok I could have but I chickened out. I still love Carter and I don't think that is going to go away but Ryan and I are having a lot of fun together and it's just nice having someone there.

The taxi pulls up to my house and I smile. Maggie has been doing really great on her own, I only had to come home for a few days thank god. I walk inside and I can see the tree lights shining, decorations hanging on the mantle. Everything is so, I don't know, in the spirit. I am surprised because Christmas has never been celebrated much in my house between manic mothers, screaming grandparents, and drunken fathers. Things are really looking great.

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The snow is crazy today, I haven't seen in like this in forever. Driving up the road in my comfy limo, hot chocolate in hand and DVD on all I want is to be back in my tiny dorm with my small bed. I hate this place, especially after being gone. I never liked the fact that I have money and I guess being gone and living, well normal, made me hate it more.

I see Gamma coming out to greet me but I yell for her to go back inside. She is going to get knocked over in this wind. I grab my bags and walk inside looking at the decorations hanging. Every year is that same thing, and although it looks great there is no family spirit to back it up. We put on a great front for everyone at the Winter party and then reside in our separate rooms. What joy.

Things at school have been great and I just want to go back. I have made a lot of friends and work has been keeping me busy. No girl, I have to admit. I just haven't found anyone that I really like... no one is Abby. I was hesitant about even coming home because of running into her but I knew I couldn't stay there alone for five weeks. What will I say when I see her? We haven't talked in awhile... things were just awkward and uncomfortable on the phone, we had nothing to say. I think we finally just faced the fact that we weren't really close anymore.

I walk into the living room to see mom and dad arguing over where to place the giant tree that they purchased again this year. They think a big tree with thousands of decorations looks good to the guests, I think it looks like we have a redwood in our living room. Every year they fight about it and every year they put it in the same spot, where gamma tells them to. Things are really looking great. not.

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Day before Christmas Susan and I head over to the diner to catch up. It was really great seeing her again but my heart was pumping when she told me Carter was in town. I obviously knew I would be seeing him, college was out for winter break and we both live down the road from each other.

"So you haven't talked to him at all?" She asks when I tell her we don't talk anymore, her eyes bugging out.

"Well, I mean every once in a while but nothing significant. We just grew apart. He doesn't even know me anymore."

"But.. I thought, I don't know I just always thought you guys would be so close."

"We are still friends, but its not the same."

"Well maybe you guys will get back on tract over these next couple weeks." I shrug trying to change the subject.

"So hows school going?"

"Eh... whatever. Anatomy is the dumbest thing ever invented." I laugh a lil understanding what she means, it is hard memorizing all of the body.

"What about you.. you haven't said much about the boy scene...your blushing!"

"Stop it!" I say quieting her and I'm sure blushing more. I tell her about ryan and she is practically jumping out of her seat.

"I don't know how serious it really is but he's fun."

"Ab this is great, you need a guy it has been to long!"

"It's been six months ass!" I say playfully and swat her in the arm. We laugh for a minute til I hear someone clear their throat.

"Hey guys." I don't even have to turn. I know it's him, I'll never forget that voice.

I turn and he smiles staring at me intensely. If I wasn't blushing before I sure am now. I hate how he has that affect on me, but god does he look better then ever. Why does he have to look so good? Why can't he have gotten fat or something.

I can feel my palms starting to sweat and I think I am breaking out in hives. I have never felt so weird before, but it has been a long time says I have seen Carter face to face.

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God why does she have to look so good. I can't get over how beautiful she is, not that I have forgotten that. I feel myself getting redder by the second and I see Susan smiling in the corner of my eye. Abby is nervous, I can tell and that makes my heart sink. Why are we acting like this, how did we get here?

"Hi." She manages after minutes of silence.

"Hi."


	46. Skating into old territory

Abby's POV

Leaving the diner that night, I felt so uncomfortable. I haven't seen Carter in almost six months and here he was walking with us like it had only been days.

"I think I am just going to walk home."

"Are you sure it's getting cold?" Susan asks.

"Nah, I feel like walking." I say and look at Carter. He nods and says the same. We turn to walk away and I can feel my palms sweating. I wanted to walk, to be alone and talk, catch up.

"So how have you been? I feel like we haven't talked in so long."

"Good, I actually wish I was back at school... everything seems so much simpler there." he says with a sarcastic laugh. I smile sadly, I actually love being home and it hurts that he would rather be at school then here with me.

"What about you... how is school going?"

"It's ok, pretty hard but the people are great."

"Yea? Any... boys?" he says hesitantly and tries to sound like he is picking on me but he isn't, and he is horrible at pretending.

"Umm.. kind of, I guess."

"Oh, well he better treat you nice." he says brotherly.

"What about you?"

"Oh yea there is this one girl, you know kind of I guess." he says smiling and I hit his arm. It's funny how much my heart sank hearing that he moved on. I mean I have, sort of but I was secretly hoping he hadn't.

"Oh wow! Look they opened up the rink again." I yell excited as we pass the ice skating rink that had been closed down. It isn't open now but it is all lit up and sparkling. Carter and I used to come down here when we were younger all the time, we has our first kiss here at age 7. I laugh to myself thinking of that.

"Yea, I thought they had closed that for good. We'll have to come down here tomorrow-"

"Tomorrow is Christmas Carter." I laugh.

"Right, well still it would be fun, I mean it's not like Christmas is that great of a holiday at my place.. you know that." he sighs a bit and I pull his arm away from the edge of the fence, dragging him back on our way.

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Christmas morning pretty much sucked. Eric was grumpy because he and his girlfriend broke up and Maggie was to busy trying to make everything right that she burnt the ham and spilled fruit punch down the front of me. She was crazy, even on medicine.

Eric locked himself in his room with the phone, Maggie spent all her time cleaning out the stove and I decided to finish presents by myself. I thought this year was actually going to be nice but it is the Wyzienski family.

I grabbed my skates and headed down to the rink, at least it wouldn't be busy with everyone at home. I glided out on the ice for the first time in almost three years and it was great, I missed skating a lot. I smiled when I saw a figure approaching me.

"Fancy seeing you here."

"I told you we would end up here today." he laughs.

"Ya well things at the household were pretty crazy so I left."

"Ya same here."

"Oven fire."

"Pregnant sister."

"Holy shit, well you win. She's pregnant?"

"Yea, three months. Some guy from grad school I guess. You should have seen my mother's face, it was amazing." he laughs and I giggle a bit. I can't believe Barbara is going to have a kid.

He grabs my hand and my heart skips a beat. How does he still have that effect on me? I hate it. He pulls me, smiling, and we skate for what seems like hours. The snow begins to fall softly catching in Carter's hair. It feels really great to hang out with him again, but it scares me how easy it would be to fall back, back to us. It scares me more how much I want to.

Please Review


	47. Midnights kiss

Well, it has been awhile. Sorry about that but I have been really busy. Hope you like it, keep up the reviews!

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Abby's POV

Sitting at the Carter mansion I can't help asking myself what the hell I am doing here. Carter and I have been talking and hanging out almost everyday since christmas and everything has been really great, just like old times. But thats the problem, it's just like old times and I can't help but fine myself attracted to him again. I know that we can't get back together, that it just would never work... plus we have new people in our lives. I just can't help fall more for him every time I see him.

"He is worse then a girl." I say to gamma as we sit down in the living room. I am wearing a thin spaghetti strapped black dress that flows down to my knees. It is the night of Susan's New Years Eve party and she insisted that we dress formal. I don't see the point, we are all going to be drunken idiots by 12.

"Hey I heard that." he says walking in with his shirt and tie. I smile wishing I could say we were going to the party together, not that I was just a ride.

"She is going to kill us, we are already 30 minutes late... thanks to someone."

"Oh, complain complain. Come on it's not my fault you were in the shower for an hour."

"There are like 10 bathrooms in this house!"

"So, I like mine!" We banter for a minute like we are old and married, which is charming and annoying at the same time. Gamma pushes out the door and we make our way to Susans.

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Susan always throws a new years party, and she has yet to get caught. I never really liked the parties to be honest, getting drunk and usually doing something stupid wasn't a great time, but we always came. This year is different, it will actually be nice to see everyone and catch up.

As we walk inside to Susans, Carter grabs my hand pulling my along. We walk for a second and then he stops realizing that he is holding my hand.

"Uh, sorry.." he says pulling back.

"It's ok."

"Old habit." he shrugs his shoulders and crinkles his nose embarrassed. I smile and shrug it off so he feels better but I am dying inside.

Everyone is having a great time. This whole formal thing was a fun idea. I have to admit I liked seeing everyone and seeing how they are doing, most people are really loving college.

Carter and I have been having a ball. We dropped the incident outside quickly, and the alcohol helped a bit I am sure. We have been very flirty and kind of hanging all over each other which would be totally awkward if I wasn't smashed. He isn't really drunk though, which makes me wonder why he is allowing this. We keep sitting close, me on his lap... he whispers stuff in my ear and flirts with me. I have been grabbing and hugging him all night and he hasn't stopped me. He probably should cause I am going to do something stupid soon.

My phone rings and it's Ryan. Great, I don't really want to talk to him now, it just makes me feel guilty and stupid for acting the way I am.

"Hello?"

"Hey, happy new year."

"Ya, you too."

"Where are you? It's so loud."

"I'm at my friends house she is throwing a party."

"Oh, sounds like fun-"

"Stop it!" I yell at Carter who is tickling me.

"Who is that?" Carter asks

"No one." I say

"What?" Ryan asks confused.

"Sorry not you." just then Carter grabs the phone from me.

"Listen, Abby is a little busy right now she will call you later."

"Carter give me the phone." I say laughing and stumbling to grab it. He flags it in the air but I can't get it from him, I'm way too short.

"Bye!" he says and hangs it up. I yell at him and he gives me the phone back but when I dial ryan again he doesn't answer... o well.

"10 minutes til midnight!" I hear someone yell and Carter screams. He drags me over to dance but Susan grabs me and pulls me away into the bathroom.

"What is going on with you two you have attached at the hip all night? What about ryan?" Ah, always the smart one.. well I don't know if there is a Ryan anymore.

"What about it, we are just having fun... come Susan it's just Carter."I laugh.

"Exactly." she says staring into me. I can't comprehend to well why she is talking to me about this but I nod and absorb what I can.

"I just don't want you to get hurt... just be careful." she says and I walk back out into the living room.

I walk over to Carter and we dance. We are grinding on each other and he starts kissing my neck. I know we really shouldn't be doing this but I don't really care at this point. I just really want to be with him again.

This countdown starts and everyone chimes in... 5...4...3..2..1...

I grab Carter and kiss him and he pulls me in, we stand there melting in each other. So much sexual tension and temptation in one kiss... absolutely suffocating. We stand there making out in the middle of the room, a few other couples around us sharing the midnight kiss. Carters hands are on my face keeping me in his embrace and my hands are wrapped around his neck. He moves his hands down my sides and grabs my waist pushing me backwards and down the hall.

What am I doing? Can I really do this? I know what is going to happen if I don't stop this but I don't know if I can. Or if I want to.

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Please review.


	48. What now?

Abby's POV

As I am getting dragged down the hall by Carter I have so many thoughts going through my head. Can I really do this? I am kind of attached, and this is Abby and Carter, we never work.

I lay down on the bed and Carters hands begin to roam all over my body. He slips his hand underneath my dress and up my thighs. I should stop this, but I don't want to. I don't have the chance anyways because all of the sudden I feel Carter pull back. He is laying over me looking at me questioningly. He climbs off of me quickly and throws his shirt back on.

"What's wrong?" I ask confused.

"We can't do this, I.. I'm sorry I shouldn't have started anything."

"I don't understand you didn't seem to mind much-" I say sarcastically.

"I know but Abby-"

"What!" I say a little upset, being rejected isn't the best feeling. Especially when you knew it was wrong but were willing anyways.

"We can't do this, you know that."

"Why not?.. no don't answer that."

"What about your boyfriend?"

"We aren't-"

"I can't take advantage of you like this, you're drunk and confused... besides there is way to much feelings here and you know it-"

"Why does this all come back to me? What about your girlfriend... and feelings? What feelings Carter, it's not like you can be bothered to even talk to me anymore-"

"There is no girl ok! Besides thats bull the phone works both ways Abby." he throws at me and sits in the chair as far away as possible. I think we are both mad but we don't know why, more mad at ourselves and the situation we always put ourselves in then each other.

"What do you mean there's no girl.. you said-"

"I lied." I let that sink in for a minute. Carter has never lied to me, not like that. Why would he lie about something so stupid?

"Why?"

"I don't know, I just.. I wanted you to think I was over you... you seemed to be over me. and when you said you were with someone I just made something up." he says and sighs.

I walk over and sit next to him, barely fitting. He looks at me for a second and I lay my head on his shoulder as he hugs me to him.

"Why do we do this?" I whisper.

"I don't know." he sighs.

"I still love you Ab." he says sadly. I snuggle into him and he pulls me back with him as he lays back in the chair, both of us falling asleep.

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"Morning, didn't think you were getting up today."Susan laughs as I stammer into the kitchen rubbing my eyes.

"Is Carter still here?"

"No, he left awhile ago... what happened last night?" she asks sitting at the bar stool. I lean my head back against the wall and sigh... I don't think I know what happened.

"Did you?" She asks hesitantly.

"No.. we were going to-"

"Abby!"

"What! I know, ok.. just please don't lecture me." I snap not wanting to hear it. I sigh and then apologize. I walk over to Susan and she hugs me.

"I am such an idiot." I mumble.

"you both are."

"Thanks." I say hitting her arm playfully. She laughs and then gets serious.

"Be careful Ab, I don't want you getting hurt.. either of you."

"I know." I say and watch her walk down the hall to the bathroom. I sit at the table, hand on chin thinking of what to say to Carter. We were drunk yes, but we both remember plenty well what happened. How embarrassing... I mean I practically jumped on him. Uh, what am I going to say to Ryan?

Please Review!


	49. As lovers go

Sorry about the wait! Long update for everyone! and thanks so much for the reviews!

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Abby's POV

So.. alcohol? Yea, not one of my strong points. What in the world was I thinking making out with Carter? Well... simple I guess, I can't deny that I don't have feelings for him still. But Susan is right, one of us if not both are going to end up getting hurt if we try to start things again, it just can't work right now, I mean we are half way across the country from each other.

I thought about going over to his house, or calling him but I just can't bring myself to, I am so embarrassed about the way I acting... but then again he wasn't exactly stopping my. Still, what about Ryan? I feel so guilty... I keep trying to convince myself that we are nothing more then casual right now but I know that is really true. I don't know what to say to either of them.

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I am such an idiot. It has been four days since Susan's party and I still haven't been able to talk to Abby. I feel so stupid for what I did, and for stopping it. I know that she would have regretted though, and I couldn't just take advantage of her. I think I feel more stupid that I told her there was no girl, that I lied. She must have thought I was so pathetic.

"You guys are ridiculous."

"Hi Susan... nice to see you too."

"Why are you still moping around? This is winter break, we are suppose to be having fun and you have been up in this room for days... and I can't say much different for the wife."

"Funny."

"Come on Carter...-"

"I know, I just feel so, I don't know embarrassed... I don't want to see her."

"Why, cause you guys hooked-up? Why don't you just tell her you still like her and get over it."

"What's your problem?" I say a little shocked with her bitchy tone.

"Sorry, I'm just sick of all of this back and forth. You guys are great together and you both want it... why can't you just get back together!"

"It's not that simple Susan! We barely even talk now, the party was just us being drunk, clinging onto what we knew.. but that's not there anymore-"

"Oh I think it's there, no I know it is. And you can't say you don't talk anymore, I mean you guys have been attached at the hip since we got home." I look away knowing she's right. It is there, and I know it. I'm just to scared to get hurt again.

"We would never see each other."

"Come on, plenty of people have done it Carter. Besides I doubt flying out to see her every once in awhile is going to hurt your bank account." she says laughing but I just give her a dirty look.

"She has a boyfriend." I say spitting out some excuse.

"Ryan? Sure maybe, but I know she would give all of that away if you told her how you felt... look I have been the one telling her not to say anything, to leave it alone... I didn't want to see you guys get hurt again... but I can't deal with this will they wont they crap for the next four years so you guys need to do something." She says running out of breath. I laugh a little seeing how worked up she is getting.

"Alright, Alright!... I'll go talk to her."

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Staring down at the icy ground, I skate along daydreaming. It's funny how the one person that makes everything simple and fun can make your life chaos. If someone had told me that things would be the way they are today between Carter and I, I think I would have labeled them mentally ill.

"Hey." Speaking of the devil.

"Hi."

"I stopped by your house but you mom said you were here so.." he says stuttering to find words like he has to explain why he's here.

"Yea, I needed to think."

"Right."

"How have you been?"

"Eh, ok. I'm sorry about the other night Ab-"

"Can we not talk about it right now." I say panicking and skating away from him to the sidelines. I don't want another fight, and mostly another rejection. After all that is what he is here for. The whole "it could never work" speech, which is usually my fort-ay.

"Well I think we should-" he says coming after me.

"Why? What is there to talk about... we were drunk."

"Come on Ab, don't do that-"

"Do what!" I say turning around from my quick pace. At this point I already have my skates off and shoes on, making my way to my car.

"Hide! Pull away! Put up that frigin wall you like so much!" he says yelling.

"I'm not! But I don't think we need to go over this, it was a mistake ok. I'm sorry but can we not embarrass me more then I already am."

"Abby don't be embarrassed. and I don't think it was a mistake, at least not for me. I don't know what I said that night but I don't regret it, and yea we weren't exactly in the best state but don't feed me that crap about being drunk. That isn't why it happened and you know it." I just stop and stare at him for a minute. Yea I know.

"So.. what then? That's it let's get back together? It doesn't just work that way, one stupid night isn't going to make things fall back into place. We don't even know each other anymore-"

"That's not true.. I mean we haven't talked much but we have been together this whole break, just like old times."

"and what happens when we go back to college? We stop talking again and then see each other next vacation? Have you thought about this Carter... I mean nothing is any different then it was last summer-"

"We can do this Abby, we can. We have been to college, we've met new people.. and we still come back to this... we know what it is like, and we can handle it... if you just try-"

"Why me?"

"What?"

"Why me?... You're right we have whole new lives and have met tons of new people, so why me? Are you sure you aren't just coming back to comfort? Cause that would make sense I mean things are no different from before, and you never tried to convince me otherwise when I said it wouldn't work.. cause you knew it wouldn't-"

"Abby, stop it. Ok just stop. You are just coming up with bullshit excuses now... Comfort?"

"Well-"

"No not well. What about you... you have a boyfriend you sure you aren't turning to me for comfort?I mean that would MAKE SENSE right." he say raising his voice. " You know why it's you, it's the same reason you keep coming back to me. The same reason why even though you have a boyfriend it still comes back to us... you know why."

"Carter-"

"Just think about it... ok? REALLY think about it." he says then comes closer and kisses me, slowly, holding my face in his hands before letting go and walking away.

Please review!


	50. For you I will

Sorry about the wait everyone... I have been trying to post for days but the site keeps giving me an error for some reason... Thanks for the reviews!

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Abby's POV

As I watch Carter walk away I find my legs starting to give way. I want to be with Carter more then anything, but I just don't want to get hurt again. I have such a hard time trusting anyone, and John was the only person that I have ever fully trusted... I guess once we broke up it made me vulnerable for him to hurt me and I hated that. I don't want to set myself up for a fall, I mean we would be so far away from each other... uh.

"And you said?"

"Well.. I didn't say anything."

"What! Why not the guy just laid his heart out and you said nothing?"

"I didn't know what to say-"

"Abby you do know what to say.. you want to get back together with him so just say it.. don't over analyze."

"You were the one telling me not to say anything to him!-"

"Abby! Ryan's on the phone for you!" I hear maggie yell up to me. I give Susan a please kill me look and she laughs.

"Must be hard having two men in love with you!" she laughs and I throw my pillow at her before getting the phone.

"Hello?"

"Hey Ab!"

"Hey ryan.. what's up?" I say nervously... I feel so guilty and I really don't want to tell him about my drunken evening.

"Nothing really, I haven't talked to you in a few days... I left some messages on your cell but you didn't call back so I was kind of worried.."

"Oh, sorry I just haven't checked them." I lie. " How is your break going?"

"Boring as hell.. I was seriously considering flying down to Chicago." he jokes but I don't laugh.

"Yea well nothing great going on here either." I say lying again. I can't find the words to tell him, he is the only guy that I have actually liked at school, and one of my good friends.

"Listen Ryan this isn't really a good time... umm.. I'll call you later ok?"

"Sure.. is everything ok?"

"Yea, just in the middle of something... talk to you later?"

"Alright bye Ab."

"Bye." I say and hang up the phone. I am such a sleeze.

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The next night I decide to head over to Carter's after I am done packing. This break really flew by, I am not sure if I am looking forward to going back to school. I still don't know what I want to do about this situation, or rather what I should do. I really love Carter and that's never going to change, but that doesn't mean that we are meant to be more then friends.

"Abby! Dear I haven't seen you in months!" Gamma greets me at the door. I love her, she is always so cheerful to me. She hugs me and tells me that John isn't here. I decide to go look for him instead of waiting all night.

I end up down by the river but I don't see him anywhere and he isn't answering his phone. I really think that we need to talk before I leave tomorrow, I can't just leave like this.

"Hey." I hear Carter's voice and turn around surprised.

"Hey, I didn't see you there."

"Yea, I noticed." he laughs a little.

"What are you doing down here? It's freezing."

"Just thinking I guess... that house drives me insane."

"Yea I know... I wanted to catch you before I leave tomorrow."

"You leave tomorrow?" he asks a little surprised.

"Yea I could only book a flight back today so... it's only two days early and the dorms are open so..."

"Right." he says acting like he didn't just freak out. I smile a little at this.

"I just thought we should talk..."

"Ok.. talk." he apparently isn't going to make this pleasant for me. Oh well I didn't expect much more.

"I'm sorry about the other day, but I guess I'm just scared... I don't know I don't want to go through all of this over again." I say slowly looking for words, I had planned this over and over but I know it wouldn't help once I saw him. "I still love you." I say and his head shoots up. "but I don't know if that's enough... we have been through so much, and being so far away... I just don't want to set us up for another fall, another fall that will end everything for good... even our friendship, cause I don't want to lose that Carter.-"

"You won't, I mean we won't. Look I know that things weren't great last year and things ended weird but I love you Ab, I know that we can make this work. and still, I don't want to start this if you don't want it."

"I do want it but-" I start to say but he kisses me hard and I stop talking. Wow. I forgot how amazing this feels. I let go for a minute and just let him kiss me, not exactly hating it. He pulls back and whispers to me.

"No buts ok... stop doing that." he laughs lightly and so do I before pulling him into another kiss.

"We're gonna be okay." he says and takes my hand, rubbing his thumb along my knuckles. I missed that romantic head over heels feeling. He can always make my stomach flutter.

I start to panic a little and almost pull back but I don't. I don't want to, and I know I would regret it later. I want to at least try to save this amazing thing we have going cause I am not sure I will ever find it again.

Please review.


	51. Forever

A/N: So I haven't been able to post for awhile... just didn't like me I guess. I am sure most of you already read this on ERHQ but a couple people haven't so I decided to post it.

Here is the last chapter everyone... thanks for sticking with me on this story, I wanted to continue it longer but I think it's time to end it. I have a wicked writers block lately with this story, I guess there just isn't much left and I want to end on a good note. I decided to bring the plot into a more recent time and bring it to an end. I hope you like it.

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Abby's POV

I peel open the box before me and sort through that many books inside. I pause when I come upon a little read book, my handwriting all over the cover. As I turn the pages I began to laugh a little, then I freeze when I come to a certain page.

_-------------------------------------------------_

_I love you Ab, I know that we can make this work. and still, I don't want to start this if you don't want it."_

_"I do want it but-" I start to say but he kisses me hard and I stop talking. Wow. I forgot how amazing this feels. I let go for a minute and just let him kiss me, not exactly hating it. He pulls back and whispers to me._

_"No buts ok... stop doing that." he laughs lightly and so do I before pulling him into another kiss._

_"We're gonna be okay."_

_---------------------------------------------------_

I sigh, just thinking about that day as I close my journal and place it back in the box. So many memories are in this little book, I can't bear to throw it away. I look next to me at the brown box labeled fragile and I carefully peel off the tape that seals the top. There are so many boxes here I don't know what to do with myself, I didn't know moving was such a hassle.

"Abby I'm going to run out and get the last couple of boxes out of the truck!" I head him yell from the door as I sit upstairs.

"OK!"

It has been 10 years since that day in by the river, and we are still standing strong. It is amazing how much our relationship relied on that one night, that one decision to end it all or keep fighting. I still remember the butterflies that I had when he kissed me that night, when he held me and told me we were going to be ok. I am so glad that I didn't walk away, that I didn't run like I do with everything else.

_Knock.Knock._

I turn to see Carter standing in the doorway with a book in his hand. He smiles at me and then looks at me with a questioning glance.

"Just thinking." I say. He walks over and sits next to me on the floor.

"What's that?" I ask inquiring of the book he has under his arm.

"Look what I found." he says and gives it to me. I open up the book and a big dorky grin spreads across my face. It's the album that Carter gave me for graduation. I flip through that pages as he laughs and points at the ridiculous pictures he managed to find for this. It is amazing to think about how long we have been together, I mean we have pictures from when we were three years old in here.

"I love this one." he whispers and I look over to see his finger brushing over the picture from the summer of sophomore year. We are standing at the oceans end with the sunset behind us, close together and our hair blowing in the wind. It is definitely a great picture. I smile thinking of the memory and laugh a bit thinking of how young and nieve we were back then.

He takes the book from me and closes it after about an hour of letting me look through it over and over again. I frown a little, but I can't sit here all day looking through a photo album I guess.

"We have a lot to pictures to add to it." he says placing it on the now bear shelf in the living room. I nod and smile. He walks into the kitchen to set up the table for us to eat and I gaze around the house. We really got a deal here, the house is amazing beautiful, and it's close to the hospital. We are both doctors now, Carter is a year ahead of me though now because I am taking sometime off. He will be starting as and R3 in two weeks at County general.

After college we decided to attend the same Medical School. It was so hard being apart for college, but we managed to get through it, roughly I might add, and we ended up getting married last year. Everyone was there, even Carter's mother. It took time for her to warm up to me but she managed. Now we are in Chicago, moving into this beautiful home and I can't help but smile. Everything really worked out.

"Hey, you ready to eat?" Carter asks coming up behind me and sliding his hands over my protruding belly. Now four months pregnant I am starting to show a little. It is so exciting for me, a couple of years ago I wouldn't even think of having kids. Not only did my earlier miscarriage make me nervous but I was too scared of ending up like my mother. However, Carter convinced me that I wouldn't be like that, and now that I am past the age for Bi-polar disease, I am much more at ease with having children.

"You mean you actually managed to put the table together?" I laugh, teasing his bad skills with directions.

"I said were you ready to eat, I said nothing about sitting at a table." he says laughing as we walk into the kitchen. I can see his attempt at the table failed as the pieces are scattered everywhere. I laugh a bit to myself and he gives me a 'not funny' look.

We grab some food and go sit on the couch in our empty living room. I put my plate down realizing that I'm not that hungry at the moment, or rather the baby is playing kickball with my stomach. I lean over and snuggle into Carter and he leans forward placing his plate on the coffee table and pulling me further into him.

"I love you." he whispers into my ear as he rubs the back of my head. He knows that puts me right to sleep.

"I love you too." I whisper back as I fall asleep in his arms, hoping that I can do this every night, forever.

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THE END

Please review! I hope everyone liked it, I didn't know how to end the story so I hope I did ok. I really loved this story, and I love the whole idea of the high school stories but I need to move forward with my new stories and hopefully you will read them as well! Thanks so much for all of the reviews and comments, I loved them!


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